Alive, Just Shattered
by inudemoness247
Summary: A long and painful year has passed since it all ended and starting another chapter in her life. Kagome is broken and full of hate and sorrow. Through the rifts of time another time is in shambles. When you lose the will to live how can you survive? SessKa
1. Neither Dead or Alive

_**Alive, Just Shattered**_

**Chapter 1: Neither Dead or Alive**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH**

* * *

Has the thought ever crossed your mind as to what keeps you alive? Well sure there is your heart, lungs, brain and that sort of thing. But as in what keeps you alive, your soul, spirit, someone or something that keeps you moving from day to day; from every sunrise to sunset, only to do it all over again.

If you have what is it that keeps you on this earth? Have you ever asked yourself what would you do if you lost that something? Could you keep on living in a world where there is nothing left for you but a cold sadness that would forever haunt you as long as you remained 'alive'?

Well of course you haven't stopped to think about what that certain thing is. Most people don't stop to think about that sort of thing. People, us human beings; no living creatures tend to avoid that kind of thing. It doesn't matter if you or mortal, immortal, human, demon, god, goddess; these sort of things just don't pop into our minds during the day.

We tend to keep to the happier things in life, because in reality we avoid what we are afraid of. Anything that has a connection with death or even revolves around death is avoided; or for the most part it is. Most are afraid of death so they don't want to think about it and like to think they will never die. I used to be one of those people.

Yes even though I never knew it I was afraid of the thought of dying or seeing someone I knew die. The past few years in my life have changed that part about me completely. If they hadn't I wouldn't be thinking of such a thing now. I have seen many die and in a way have even died myself.

As confusing and unbelievable as it may sound I am dead but yet technically alive. Yes I am still breathing and walk among the world of the living, and I am sitting here at this very moment breathing as I watch the day come and go. You want to know how I am like this; I am like this because I have lost everything that gave me the will to live but something that I don't even know what, refuses to let me die all the way.

The things I found out that keep us wanting to live are in our very soul and spirit, imprinted within all of ourselves. For me it had been my friends, family, the mission, and him. Yes it was you Inuyasha, the man I loved but to never be loved by. I had known this for so long before that day, ever since the day I told you that I would stay by your side because all I really wanted was for you to be happy, even if that meant you would be with Kikyo.

It wasn't till that final day that my soul began to fall apart like tiny shards of glass, like the shards of the jewel we had hunted for so long. It were those many shards that brought us all together and me to you and yet at the same time killed me. I do not blame you for this happening to me, or the one you choose, or Naraku who killed them. No, I blame only one thing, the Shikon.

It has been a year since that day when my soul began to fall apart. My will to live was in my soul, my very spirit. But with my soul's vanishing so did my life because my will to live was in that which fell apart.

A year ago was the final battle with Naraku. The only shards left were the ones he had. Koga had been killed along with those remaining in his pack that were still alive. Both Miroku and Sango had been killed along with the one I had come to know as a son. Yes Shippo, he had been killed right in front of me but only an arm reach away. So close that his blood had been spilt onto me when a demon suddenly appeared taking his head.

I remember the shock, sorrow, and pain I felt when I helplessly watched all my friends die. But I didn't let their deaths be in vain. I was there along with the remaining others, which were Inuyasha, Kikyo, and Kirara. By the time my friends and son had been killed Naraku's army had been killed leaving only Kagura and Naraku himself. Kohaku had died at the beginning when Naraku took his shard from his back. Miroku and Sango had managed to kill Kanna and with all of us combined we took on the demon army. Koga and his pack along with Inuyasha had killed Kagura.

In the end it was the two arrows, one mine the others Kikyo's and Inuyasha's sword that killed Naraku. I had purified the jewel and brought it together before handing it over to Inuyasha. I hated that jewel and wanted noting of it but knew you had wanted it for so long. So Inuyasha made his wish, that Kikyo and him would be together. She was brought back to life fully, so where would that leave me?

For some reason my soul refused to go to her but instead the part of my soul in her came back to me. I guess you could say it wasn't a match. Somehow or another though Kikyo was brought back, just as she was before she died. When I handed the jewel over to him I knew what his wish would be and I of course did nothing to try and stop him.

I wanted Inuyasha happy, smiling, and laughing; even if it was with Kikyo. Maybe if I had never given the jewel to him to make the wish I wouldn't have turned out this way. One of the last things giving me the will to live had been ripped away. I couldn't be with Inuyasha; he had Kikyo. Because of that I began to die.

After everything was said and done and we had burned or friend's bodies I went to go home. There was no reason to stay in a time I didn't belong and had nothing for me anymore. As I jumped into the old yet so familiar well for what I thought would be the last time there was something missing. There was no blue glow sending me back, no graceful landing telling me I was home, no roof above telling me I was in the well house. No I was stuck in a time I didn't belong in.

Along with Inuyasha's wish the jewel had vanished; I could never return home. So I have the jewel to blame for bringing me here. For so many deaths including the ones I held dear and now for not allowing me to return to my own time. I was stuck here, in my own time I could have healed these wounds. I am covered in scars that can't be seen these are scars of the mind, emotionally.

Seeing as I could not return home Kaede, Inuyasha, and Kikyo offered that I remain in their village. I had no where to go so I stayed. As it turns out now that Kikyo was as she was so long before, was actually very nice. Both Kaede and Kikyo both helped train me in the past year. Now that I was stuck here I no longer wear that old school uniform but miko garbs, though a bit different from Kikyo's. The pants are black while the top is blue.

Kikyo and Inuyasha are now mates. They both have their own hut and have begun their family and life together, after all a whole year has passed now. Kikyo still helps the injured and keeps the village safe from demons as she did fifty years ago. I now live with Kaede in her hut along with Kirara who has remained with me ever since I began my life here. I help Kaede and the village as much as I can as a miko. Kirara has become what it seems like my only friend and even though I can't really talk to her I am fine with it, after all I never do talk as it is.

Ever since that day when my time refused to let me back, the day when my soul just shattered I haven't talked. I may occasionally say a word or two when needed, but unless it is I don't. Inuyasha and the others don't try to get me to talk because they know what all happened and for some reason can't help but pity me.

You might think that if my soul is shattered that I would be some sort of lifeless body that can't move yet somehow breaths. Well, my soul and spirit is still there in me, just shattered but remaining in me. As though it is just waiting to be put back together. But could I ever be healed? To have my will, soul, and spirit brought back together as the jewel was? Maybe there is something in me that knows it will, that is why maybe I am still alive.

Right now it seems hard to believe that I could become anywhere like I used to be. It would take a lot to do that. But maybe one day I can feel the joys of life again and finally be able to live and feel as I once was.

Over the past year I have gain control over my powers thanks to a lot of Kikyo's help. I can shoot a bow now with perfect aim. I have even gone and taught myself on my own how to use my energy into attacks without the use of a bow. Inuyasha even helped me with the use of a sword and I have even learned how to fight with the old staff Miroku once had.

I couldn't just leave the staff, so I kept it to remember him by. As for Sango, I had Kirara for that. I would have kept her Hiraikotsu but it had been broken in half. I had taken the ribbon Shippo used to tie his hair and tied it around the hilt of my sword. The sword had been given to me as a gift from Tetsusaiga's creator.

I was hardly ever needed in the village seeing as there were two other miko's so I had a lot of free time. Inuyasha who also had a lot of free time now that he didn't have jewel shards to find saw that; I sparred with him most of the day. Even though he had chosen Kikyo him and I were still friends. Even though he never would say it, even during one of our many sparring matches he never said it. But I knew why he spent so much time during his day sparring with me, it was the same reason Kikyo and Kaede helped train me so much.

None of them liked what I had become and for some reason they all felt guilty. In each of their eyes I could see sympathy, pity, and sadness when they looked at me. By keeping me training and working so much they hoped that I would snap out of whatever I was in and somehow save me from myself.

One day Inuyasha and I had been resting on a grassy hill that looked over the village after a sparring match. He told me he was sorry for everything that happened saying he blamed himself. He said if he hadn't continuously dragged me back here from my own time he may have been able to save me from all of this. He also said that my eyes have changed. He told me they looked like ice. Cold and hiding so much while allowing you to see the sadness, pain, and sorrow underneath if you stopped to look for just a second. The longer you looked the more he said you could see it and drew you in filling you up with what you saw in them.

Inuyasha said he blamed himself for the look in my eyes and for putting it there. I told him not to. If they wanted to blame anything blame the jewel, because out of everything that is what I blame.

Oh I do blame the jewel more than anything. Even though I hate it, I don't hate who created it only the jewel it self. As the days grew on I could feel the hate building up in me, swaying the purity in myself turning my powers dark. As soon as I would start to train though it would vanish completely, erasing every trace that it had ever been there.

In my training I could forget it all and get lost in this little world where only the weapon in my hands and myself moving it was there. All the memories of my friends, pain, sorrow, and anguish would vanish with the swing of my arm and my weapon in my hand. I didn't train to get stronger I did it so for some time I would be able to forget.

The truth was even though I trained a lot and had actually become quite good with all the weapons and things I trained in I never used them in real battle except sparring matches with Inuyasha. The sword I swung through the air so much during my training routines had yet to be covered in blood of another. My powers that I have trained have yet to be used to actually kill as well as the arrows I use with my bow. In fact I haven't killed for a bit over a year now.

It wasn't like I wanted to go out and kill someone or something. No in fact I could care less about that. All I cared about was training, and being able to forget while I lost myself in the movements of the weapon in my hands.

My power was actually unknown as to how much it was really and how high. It seemed because my soul was 'shattered' that so was the ability for anyone to find out how much power I possess. I merely seemed like a harmless miko that could do no more than heal. It had startled both Kaede and Kikyo when they could barely feel my aura. It was like it was there yet it wasn't at the same time. Like it to was shattered and lost waiting to be put back together.

Kagome wondered why when Inuyasha made his wish that her soul just hadn't gone to Kikyo. She was the reincarnation of Kikyo, right? She had a lot of questions actually. Like her power seemed somehow different from Kikyo's along with so much more.

As time went on her speed increased dramatically and made some wonder if she didn't have some kind of demon blood in her. But that was the fact she didn't have demon blood in her, not even a drop. She just came to the conclusion it was due to all the hours of training and her powers. She could even now sneak up on Inuyasha without him even sensing her, even with his demon senses. She could be so quiet that it was like she wasn't there and could move so fast that she could just move in a blur. No one thought much of this not even Kagome did. She didn't care and wasn't bothered by it. Why should she?

* * *

Today was like any other day really. Kaede was helping the villagers that needed it and was tending to her herb garden. Kikyo and Inuyasha had gone to help a village up north. The village had been plagued by attacks by a low class demon. So as predicted when one of the villagers came asking for their help they left right away. Kaede would help any that got sick and if it came to it Kagome would be able to protect the village from any demons while they were gone.

Kagome was currently at a river near the village. If something happened that she was needed for like an attack she could get back to the village in no time at all. Besides if a demon did come she would be able to sense them before they could do any harm.

The cool water slowly flowed past her; it would be winter soon. Fall had been here for some time and it had been a bit more calming for Kagome. She would often go and sit on the hill that looked over the village watching the leaves of the trees slowly change color. As time went on each and every leaf fell making the trees bare. Everything began to look dead as the cold took over. Kaede had said the first snow would be here soon, said it was something she could sense, like a sixth sense.

Kagome hoped the old miko was right. One thing she loved was the snow. When the world around her would be covered in a blanket of white, that stretched out as far as the eye could see. The cold never bothered her really and she actually preferred it. The icy coldness that she would get made her numb. Another way to help forget even for just a minute.

Kagome was sitting on the riverbank with her knees drawn up against her chest, her arms wrapped around them, and her head resting on her knees. She gazed at the crystal clear water in silence. Kirara was sleeping, curled up into a ball next to her. She could see their faces on the waters surface, the faces of her dead friends.

She wondered if her family in the future thought she was dead or had some hope she was still alive and would come home one day. She was alive but there was no way for her to go home. She would remain here for the rest of the days till she finally died.

So is this what became of the miko that shattered the jewel she had come so much to hate? There seemed to be nothing worth living for and as she looked and thought about it there wasn't. Her friends were dead, Naraku was dead along with his followers, she would never be able to return to her time, never to see her family again, Inuyasha and Kikyo had each other, after Kaede died Kikyo could take her place. If she had no purpose then why was she still here? Was it a punishment for something?

As Kagome sat there on the riverbank watching the water flow by her anger increased. She was angry at what her life had become, for being stuck here, and for the jewel that had ruined everything in her life. She wanted so badly to just scream at the top of her lungs but found she couldn't, because when she did nothing could come out. It was like everything was trapped within her about to burst.

She just wanted to kill or destroy something; the jewel is what she wanted that something to be. But that was just the thing she couldn't. The jewel had vanished going out of her reach. Even if she did have the jewel, what would she do, step on it? No matter what she would never be able to do anything to the jewel; like it was mocking her. If she broke it, it was still there and could be put together.

Kagome let out a sigh. She was really pathetic; she was mad at a jewel of all things. Kagome suddenly stood walking off into the woods. Kirara who had just waken up quickly got up and followed her. Where was a demon attacking the village when you wanted them to! If a demon was attacking the village she could at least take off some anger and frustration by killing it.

Before long Kagome found herself on the grassy hill looking over the village. The sky had an orange glow to it signaling that the sun was setting. Night would be upon them soon. Inuyasha and Kikyo should be back soon; they had been gone for a while now. Kagome watched as the villagers headed in to the warm comfort of their homes and the diner that awaited them. Kagome looked down at Kirara as she meowed.

"You can go ahead. I'll be in, in a little bit." Kagome said telling the fire cat that she could go inside where Kaede awaited them.

The small cat meowed one more time before bounding off down the hill and towards Kaede's hut. A tired sigh escaped her lips as she gazed over the village. She didn't want to go in just yet, she needed to let out some of this frustration first. Kagome moved her hand unsheathing her blade as she began more of her 'training'.

Before long she was lost in the sound of the blade cutting through the air, the whooshing sound it would make. Her eyes focused on the swift smooth movements of her sword and the hand that moved it. Over the past year since she had begun training her movements have become more graceful and perfected. Her stance was better as well along with everything else.

It wasn't much longer till Kagome had closed her eyes listening to the sounds and the humming the sword made; it was like a soft lullaby. The movements were so familiar to her, the soft humming brought her to peace, and it was the only thing she knew now; the only thing to loose herself in completely.

Kagome hummed along with her sword as she continued the movements, the sound matching perfectly. It was like the sword and her were singing a secret song that only they knew the words to. Kagome became so caught up in it that she never noticed when the blade stared to glow purple. The color going perfect with the color of the sky as the sun descended.

To anyone that saw her at that moment would agree that it was a beautiful sight. A slight purple glow hanging in the air where the sword moved. Kagome's long hair flew about her as she moved catching the last rays of the sun, which was setting behind her. Her face was calm and had a look of utter peace.

Everything was brought to an abrupt halt. Kagome stood up straight, her sword still in her hand. Kagome's humming stopped and her eyes popped open looking straight ahead. A faint pulse was heard; the glow around the blade soon surrounded her. She was taken back a bit the air in front of her rippled.

Kagome looked at what was before her in confusion as to what it was exactly. Cautiously she lowered her sword a bit while stepping forward bringing her hand up. A warm feeling jolted through her hand as she touched it. Suddenly a hole opened up, a blue light emanating from it; the hole growing larger by the second till it was big enough to walk through. Kagome quickly jerked her hand back as her fingertips got shocked.

'What?' Kagome thought jumping back when she felt something coming through.

Before Kagome now stood a demon. He was about Sesshomaru's height with green scaly skin. His eyes were all yellow besides his red pupils. He was wearing nothing but a plain pair of brown pants. His sharp yellow claws ready to kill.

"Hmm – what do I have here?" The demon spoke. One of his fangs showing as he grinned at her. "Don't tell me you are trying to kill me."

"Well I don't understand how you got here or what that thing is exactly but seeing as you are here and can cause harm to this village I will. Besides I've been needing to release some stress." Kagome said grinning and getting into fighting stance raising her sword.

"Like you could kill me." He said laughing at her.

"At least put up a fight, humor me." Kagome said smiling.

The demon snorted and grinned at her before lunging at her. The moment he leapt towards her Kagome leapt back into the air. She came back down swinging her sword at him. Kagome was a bit surprised when he quickly twisted a bit and back flipped out of the way. In several swift moves the demon was behind Kagome about to thrust his hand through her chest. Kagome turned around swinging her blade cutting of the demon's hand.

"Wench, you will pay for that." The demon said trying to grab Kagome with the hand he still hand.

Kagome got out of the way just in time, putting some distance between the two. Her attention went to the hole that the demon had came out of not to long ago. She could feel it; more were coming. She had no time to play with this low class demon. Kagome quickly charged forward slicing the demon's head off; or at least that is what she would have hoped had happened. The moment she got close enough the demon grabbed her wrist throwing her into the portal from where the demon had come.

Everything seemed to slow down, like watching a movie play in slow motion. Anxiety built by the second as Kagome wondered what was going to happen. She soon found out. Everything soon changed around her as she entered the portal. At first it was blue like the well's portal had been, then it changed to a dark crimson. She could feel the presence of demons approaching her and fast.

What was she to do? She was all alone and she wasn't even sure of where she was. There was no way she could take on all the demons that were coming her way by herself. That was just the thing, there wasn't anyone her to help her. Outside of this that demon still stood, he was alive. The village was helpless unless somehow Kirara could kill the demon on her own. Kaede would be of no use; she was to old now to be of much help when it came to killing demons.

She had let them down. How many times would she let someone down when it mattered the most? Well of course she couldn't answer that she couldn't see into the future. As the demons drew closer she wasn't afraid but she was disgusted. That she couldn't protect the villagers. Kagome didn't even know how to get back to them.

Suddenly they hit her like a giant wave crashing down onto the rocks. Demons swarmed around her in a frenzy. They all seemed to be going in one direction, from what seemed as where she had come from. That meant the village would be covered with them soon.

Surprisingly none of them paid her much attention. They all went by her in a rush like they were trying to get through this 'portal' or whatever it was as soon as they possibly could. Every now and then one might give her a look as they hurried by. At least they weren't trying to kill her, but could the same fate be said for the villagers? She couldn't take that chance. Kagome could at least try and stop some of them now.

Kagome focused on all of her energy into her pulling it to the surface. If she was lucky she could take out a bunch of them in one blow. Though in the end she would be powerless, all of her energy drained; but it was worth a shot. Soon every inch of her skin was tingling, it was now or never she guessed. As she opened the imaginary doors that were within her, her energy flooded out in a giant wave.

Every demon around her was hit with it, and was immediately killed. It hit them all hard, like the raging waves pounding against the rocks by the shore. Her energy for some reason didn't seem like it had a color; it was like the wind. You couldn't really see it but you could feel it. The only way you knew it was there by feeling it and seeing it hit others around you in it's disturbance.

Kagome's eyes widened at the sight. The demons were quickly torn apart as though they had been thrown into a blinder. Soon there was nothing left of them. They had all, to her surprise, been killed. The village would be safe, good.

Even though the demons were gone Kagome seemed to still have energy pouring out of her. There seemed to be no way to stop it. The wall that had been built to keep it in had been broken like a dam and her energy was pouring out of her like flooding waters.

All the stress it was putting on her body as it flooded out seemed like it would tear her body into shreds from all the stress. Kagome was suddenly scared; she was terrified. It was like she was being killed by her own energy and it was scaring the hell out of her.

Then it struck her and hard. It felt like a dagger was stabbing her. But the pain was all over and it never lessened, the pain only grew. Kagome finally let it out, she screamed at the top of her lungs. The high-pitched scream was carried with the giant wave of energy as it rushed out to where she didn't know. The scream seemed like it would break glass.

_'Gods make this stop.'_

* * *

All around it was quiet and dark. The moon above was full on the cool night. Demons slept in peace. Alone in the middle of a grassy area laid the opening that had been made by the portal. Here on the other end of the portal a few demons still ventured out trying to get to the portal that all of them had felt. It was a way out, to where they only assumed Ningenkai, the human realm. As long as it got them out of the Makai they didn't care.

Suddenly all the demons that had still been trying to reach the portal stopped at once. They all felt it as their eyes widened. Suddenly it hit them all knocking them back a bit before they were no more as the wave of raw energy hit them. The last thing they heard was the banshee like scream as they quickly faded off to their deaths in the after life.

All of the demons for miles met the same fate. Those that had been heading for the portal and even those that hadn't were killed. The sleeping had been woken up by the scream, the moment they had opened their eyes they had been killed.

Finally the wave of raw energy was gone, as though it had never been there. In its leaving was destruction along with the absence of thousands of demons. Those that had been killed didn't have a trace that they had been there or ever been alive. All of the trees that had been in the area had been knocked down as though a powerful wave of water came taking it all down. The leaves that had still clung to the trees during the cold time of the year were gone leaving the trees completely bare.

The portal finally began to flicker in and out like a burning out light bulb. It was like the energy was too much for it. Finally it went out disappearing from sight leaving the destruction behind giving no real clue as to what brought the destruction. All that had been there to see it was dead now.


	2. Belonging

_**Alive, Just Shattered**_

**Chapter 2: Belonging**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH**

* * *

All she saw was a sea of pitch black. Like someone had suddenly turned off the lights leaving you in the dark. Kagome felt alone, more alone than she had grown to be in the past year. From somewhere she could hear someone talking, though their words were mumbled. Why couldn't she see? Or for that matter, hear them like she should? Where was she, what was going on? These were some of the questions that were going through Kagome's mind as she tried to figure out what was going on. 

Slowly things got a bit brighter as to where she could make out the outline on a figure. They must be the one that was talking. Kagome suddenly felt herself being shaken, who was shaking her?

The next thing she saw was gold. Inuyasha was over her, shaking her and calling out her name. Kagome was back on the grassy hill, a cold breeze hitting her from behind. Kikyo was kneeled down beside her saying something before smacking Inuyasha away.

What had happened to the demon, what about the village? Kagome's worries loosened once she saw the remains of the demon a little ways away behind Inuyasha. She looked off to the side to see the village was safe. Some of the villagers were looking around while others walked back inside to the warmth of their huts.

Kagome turned her head back to Inuyasha. She could see the worry in his eyes, though he tried to hide it even though it didn't work. He was saying something but all she could hear was mumbling. She then turned her attention to Kikyo. She like Inuyasha has the same look of worry and concern in her eyes. Suddenly everything snapped back to normal and she could hear them clearly.

"Kagome, are you alright?" Kikyo asked in worry.

"I think so." Kagome said.

Even though she said that she didn't really mean it. She was confused, that anxious feeling still coursed through her, and the pain from before was still there. Though she still had the pain it wasn't as intense. It was more of a dull ache that covered every inch of her.

There was just so much coursing through her that it was becoming to much for her. Se felt like everything would just burst like it had before. She was still confused as to how that happened. Hell, she didn't even understand how that portal or whatever it was appeared.

Why had all of those demons gone through it like that? What was on the other side that made them try to come here? Was it something horrible like hell? Or maybe there was someone like Naraku there that they were running from. If she had gone, what would she have found? Another world she could start over in? Maybe even a way to get back to her own time; where she belonged.

"What the hell happened!" Inuyasha demanded to know.

"I'm not sure. Who killed the demon?"

"What him? I did of course." Inuyasha said standing up right and crossing his arms.

"When we got back we noticed him and destroyed him before any harm could befall on the village." Kikyo said in a soft calm tone.

"Oh."

"That still doesn't explain what happened!" Inuyasha said in his usual manner.

"All I really know is somehow when I was training with my sword and some kind of portal appeared. That demon you killed came out of it. I had been trying to get rid of him when he through me into the portal where he came."

"That explains how the demon got here. But a portal just appearing like that?" Kikyo said in confusion.

"What happened in there?" Inuyasha asked.

"What?"

"I could feel a large amount of power from inside." Kikyo said.

"There were hoards of demons all heading here. I'm not sure where hey were coming from but I knew I couldn't let them get here. So I brought all my energy to the surface to destroy them all in one wave. I am still confused as to what happened."

"Well all that matters is the village and you are fine. Inuyasha carry her to Kaede's." Kikyo instructed.

"No, I'm fine. I can walk on my own, it's alright." Kagome said standing weakly.

"No you're not. You can barely stand." Inuyasha said receiving a heated glare from Kagome.

"I can walk on my own." She said heading towards Kaede's hut. Inuyasha moved to go after her but Kikyo held out her arm stopping him.

"Let her be." Kikyo said as she sadly gazed at Kagome's retreating form.

"She's to weak and can barely walk-."

"Kagome doesn't want your help or anyone's for that matter. It would be best to leave her alone." Kikyo said as she headed for her own hut. Inuyasha followed soon after looking back one last time sadly at Kagome.

In just one year she had changed completely. Kikyo was the one full of life where as Kagome was the silent darker one. Kagome had separated herself from everyone, it pained them all to see her like this. The reason why they were pained because they blamed themselves; when in reality it was that and their pity that disgusted Kagome to no end.

She didn't want their pity, something that would make her what she once was. She cared nothing of them anymore. Everything here was a reminder of what she had and lost. She lost Inuyasha, the only one she had ever loved. When it came down to it she would die for him if it meant he would live on and survive. In the end that is what happened and Inuyasha never saw it happen till it was already way too late.

Kagome gave everything to him and got nothing in return. The only thing that made her happy what so ever was that. Inuyasha was happy, alive, and with Kikyo. She was suffering but he wasn't. Kagome couldn't deny she didn't love him anymore, if she did that would be a lie.

The pain she would get at the thought of him with another was no longer there really. Kagome ignored that pain till the point it was like it wasn't there. Like someone had turned the switch for her to feel off or something. Everything was just so confusing but that didn't matter because the only one who would ever have to try and understand it was Kagome.

Every day she slowly fell apart even more it seemed, if that was even possible. Would she continue to fall apart till there was nothing left? Why was she even here still? Was she being punished for their deaths? For the deaths of all that suffered and died when that jewel came back? After all, the jewel was brought back because of her. Maybe a god somewhere hated her and was making sure she suffered.

'_I have to get out… somewhere a way from here_.' Kagome thought as she slowly made her way in the direction of Kaede's hut.

Through all the pain, sorrow, and confusion all she knew is she had to get out. Run away as far as she could. The only problem was running to somewhere that wouldn't bring her memories. All over there were memories, after all they had traveled all over. A place where they had fought for their lives, spent a happy moment or sad; she would run into them everywhere.

Was there any way to be free of this? Somewhere where she could run and hide or just sleep the rest of her life away. Maybe she could have been trapped in that 'void' or whatever it was. She was sure that any one of those demons that passed her could have killed her. Why couldn't they have?

'_Will death just not accept me? Am I forbidden to die, because there is no way that there is something left for me here. Sango and the others deserved to live not someone as worthless as me._' Kagome thought in bitter anger as she walked to the old hut in the cold darkness.

It seemed to be getting darker by the second as any trace of light was erased from sight. The darker it got the colder it seemed to get for some reason. If Kagome looked she could probably see her own breath now. Hopefully it would snow soon. Maybe the cold of the snow would consume her and freeze her, and she would finally be brought to her demise.

It was truly sad when you could feel the change within yourself. Kagome could feel a bitter hate growing within herself. She wondered if this was what Kikyo had felt when she had been resurrected from the dead, if so had that hate gone to her?

This hate within her was odd. She hated it, it stood for everything that had happened and everything she had lost. It reminded her of the change within her over the past year. But strangely she loved it. Kagome wanted to be consumed by this hate for some reason. Because even though it was hate that she was feeling, she **WAS** feeling something. It let her know she was alive if she could feel, then again she hated that feeling. Because inside she didn't want to be alive at all.

It was so confusing; she wanted to die and be alive it seemed at times all at once. That seemed impossible to want the same things at once. She was selfish, yes she was. She didn't deserve to be alive when so many were suffering and people so much greater than herself had died. Maybe that is why she wanted to die, because it was out of guilt. Well that and other things.

When you are living and you have lost everything you have ever known all you know is pain, a pain that will never vanish from your being. During this time you kind of know you wont die and you accept that. But it doesn't help the fact the pain is still there and you are doing everything to try and loosen it, even if by a little.

When Kagome walked in Kaede was already fast asleep. The fire still burned, but you could tell by its constant flickering it would be out soon enough if more wood wasn't added to it. The pot that held the stew Kaede had made was still over the flickering flame. It almost made Kagome smile at the old women's thoughtfulness.

Tiredly Kagome walked over sitting down, fixing herself a bowl. Kagome quickly ate before cleaning things up. Everyday seemed to be so dull. Everything seemed so… _pointless_. Kagome couldn't see how Inuyasha could take such a dull life. Then again this must seem all to familiar to him, seeing as this is how things used to be for him.

Kirara mewed quietly as she walked over to Kagome in her smaller form. Kagome managed a small smile - though it was barely noticeable - as she picked the fire cat up. Was Kirara just as bored with this life style as she was? Kirara had always lived an eventful life. From when she was with the demon slayers till the little jewel shard hunting group, even before that things had been more eventful for the fire cat.

Maybe it was time that she left, maybe things would get better if she did. If they didn't oh well but she knew she could no longer stay here, in this place. Kirara looked up and mewed, as if she knew what she was thinking about. Where would she go?

* * *

The land in the Makai that had been destroyed by the wave of energy was still the same sight. Everything looked dead and had a cold feeling to it. Whether it was because of the season's changing or the gloomy sight the ferry girl couldn't tell. High above the destruction she sat on her oar with wide eyes as she slowly made her way across the sky. The sight she saw went on for miles and not one demon, where usually there were many all around, were all gone. 

It was only a few minutes before the radars back in Spirit World were going off like crazy. Spirit World was in an uproar right now with everyone rushing about in the hectic moment. What had scared them the most was the fact everyone in Spirit World could feel something, even without the radars.

Koenma had tried to pull up the site up on his screen but nothing showed up on the TV. All that showed up was a fuzzy screen. The moment the radars went off thousands of demon souls busted into Spirit World; what ever had happened wasn't good. Seeing as she had been there at the time and they didn't have time to get Yusuke and the others Botan had rushed off to Makai where the strong surge of energy had been detected; that is where Botan was now.

The once lush green, life full area was now a wasteland. As to what had caused this, she hadn't a clue. In only minutes so much had happened and now after seeing the destruction Botan was scared. She wanted nothing more than to get out of there as soon as she could.

"Dear god, what happened?" Botan whispered with a look of horror on her face.

* * *

It was early morning, all of the villagers were still asleep. On top of the hill looking over the village Kagome stood with Kirara on her shoulder. The sun was beginning its journey up the sky, just enough light was out giving you the ability to see. The ground was covered in frost and the air was cold. It was cloudy out saying that it would rain soon, maybe even snow. 

Kagome looked over the village one more time, this would be her last time. She had left a letter inside Kaede's hut explaining that she had left to be on her own so that they hopefully wouldn't worry and come after her. She could handle everything on her own. This was for the best, it had to be.

'_Farewell_.'

* * *

There was no word to describe Spirit World and the current time. Everyone was running around in a crazed frenzy. They all seemed to be panicking. Papers covered the floor but that seemed to go unnoticed in all the rush. 

"Botan! Hurry up!" Koenma said as he panicked; even though Lady Death wasn't there to hear his words.

"Koenma sir, we still haven't been able to find out what happened but demon souls are still keep coming in." George said just before Botan appeared back in Koenma's office.

"Were you able to find anything out?" Koenma asked.

"E-everything…all the demons…they are.. gone." Botan said, her face pale white still from the shock of what she had just saw.

"What?"

"All the demons for miles around are all gone. There is no trace that any had even been there. Everything has been… destroyed."

"What caused it?"

"I don't know."

"Contact Yusuke and the others and bring them in." Koenma said in a serious tone.

* * *

It was about mid afternoon and Kagome had been walking for awhile now. It was cold, the freezing winds blowing against her back didn't help either. But strangely Kagome liked it. The bitter cold seemed to numb her. Kirara had been walking along with her when she suddenly stopped and transformed, motioning for Kagome to get on. 

"Thank you." Kagome said quietly giving the fire cat a smile. A smile that was full of sadness and inflicted the same sadness into those who saw it.

Kirara mewed as Kagome went and got on her back. Kirara might not be able to really talk or at least in a way that Kagome could understand and talk back but she understood and knew what was going on, more than people realized. Slowly, bit by bit Kagome was dying. The empty sadness had consumed her long ago. Regret, loneliness, hate, anger, sorrow; these were some of the emotions that were consuming her.

These things are what drove her into the cold, where she was now. It was obvious she cared nothing for her self, so she cared not if she died. She would walk through a blizzard and not stop to find shelter to keep warm, that is if she could even feel it.

Kirara often wondered if Kagome could even feel anything anymore. Like now she showed nothing that would tell she was cold what so ever. It wouldn't surprise the fire neko if Kagome couldn't. Kagome seemed worse than Kikyo had ever been. Kagome was far to quiet than Kikyo was after she had been brought back from the dead. Kagome seemed… empty. It was like she had become Kanna, minus the white hair along with the young incarnation's appearance.

"Land at the next village." Kagome instructed in her empty, monotone voice.

* * *

It had only just begun to snow and it was already sticking to the grounds. Kikyo and Inuyasha walked into Kaede's hut shivering a bit. Kaede was sitting next to the stew pot cooking some warm food to share with the others. A sad look graced the old miko's features. 

"Where is Kagome?" Kikyo asked as she and Inuyasha sat down next to the warm fire warming up.

"Knowing her she is probably up on that hill training with that stupid sword that Totosai just had to make her, even though its cold as hell out."

"It is cold and now it's snowing, she shouldn't be out side in this weather; she could get sick." Kikyo said, worry in her eyes.

Kikyo felt bad for Kagome. She knew how it felt to be in her position, or somewhat at least. The empty feeling, sorrow, and regret; now that she wasn't feeling it she had to watch Kagome suffer as she went through what she had only a year ago.

"Not like she cares if she gets sick or anything." Inuyasha said in his usual way only this time you could hear the sadness in his voice.

"There is something ye should know." Kaede said looking up from the steaming stew. "Kagome has left."

"Left?" Kikyo asked.

"She left early this morning before anyone was awake."

"I'll go after her." Inuyasha said standing up quickly.

"She left this letter." Kaede said handing him a letter.

"What does this say?" Inuyasha asked handing it to Kikyo who was now standing beside him.

"She said she's going and not to go after her. This is something she wants to do and she hopes we can understand." Kikyo said with a sad tone as she read the note.

"Sh-she left? But why?"

"Kagome must have known that it her time to leave." Kaede said sadly, her hands folded in her lap as she stared at the fire; a sad look upon her face.

"Her time to leave? She belongs here; she can't survive out there on her own." Inuyasha said objecting to something he had really no say so in.

"Inuyasha maybe it was for the best." Kikyo said sadly sitting down across from her sister.

"For the best! How can it be for the best if she's out there on her own? She'll go and get killed, Kagome wasn't born in this time."

"But she has gone through just as much as any of us has." Kikyo said, her eyes hardening some as she remembered the events that went on a year ago; what they all had gone through.

"But-." Inuyasha said when Kikyo cut him off.

"Inuyasha you must understand that Kagome was slowly killing herself by staying here. It was to painful for her. It is better she is out there. At least out there she has a chance."

"A chance?"

"After all that child has been through she deserves a chance to be happy and live again as much as any of us; she cant do that if she is here." Kaede said continuing.

"It's just hard - I mean after everything-."

"We can only wish for the best." Kikyo said placing a hand on Inuyasha's shoulder as he sat down next to her.

"What, and just hope she lives? Kagome has never been on her own in this time."

"I am sure after everything, the final battle, and this past year Kagome can protect herself. Over this past year… she has changed in more ways than one." Kikyo said sadly as she turned her gaze to the burning flames.

"But she can't and wont protect herself from herself." Inuyasha said sadly.

"That is her worst threat; something that ye can not save her from I'm afraid." Kaede said pouring some of the steaming stew into the bowls and handing them to Kikyo and Inuyasha, saving one for herself.

"That's why I have got to at least and bring her back here. Out there she will end up getting herself killed!" Inuyasha said in anger.

"It is to late now; she has gone."

"I'm not some human; I can find her a lot faster-."

"I'm human." Kikyo said narrowing her eyes at him for the _'insult'_.

"Kikyo I didn't mean it like that! I'm just saying I can leave now and be back by tomorrow morning with her."

"Right." Kikyo said taking a bite of her food.

"Ye should respect Kagome's wishes. It was her choice to do this. If she were to die at least she may have found happiness outside of this nightmare she had been brought into." Kaede said silencing Inuyasha before he could say anything farther.

"Happiness?" Inuyasha said in thought.

"Inuyasha, you and I have found happiness and we have been happy in the past year; haven't we?" Kikyo asked looking Inuyasha in the eyes.

"Of course."

"Well is it to much to ask for her to be happy once again as well? It would be selfish for us to deny her that wish if we went after her bringing her back here to a place that will only continue farther to bring her pain." Kikyo said.

"It is my fault she became like this; I continued to bring her back here till it was to late for her. I can't just desert her now."

"You aren't in a way; just because she has left doesn't mean we wont see her again." Kikyo said with hope.

"Ye may see Kagome again; if not in this life time maybe in the next." Kaede said in agreement.

"Hopefully that wont have to happen where I can only see her in the next." Inuyasha said as he began his warm meal.

Kagome meant so much to him as a friend. These past few months she was dying more quickly, fading away to nothing. Inuyasha hoped he could find happiness somewhere out there. He prayed that something could save the girl from herself.


	3. Paths that lead us

_**Alive, Just Shattered**_

**Chapter 3: Paths that lead us**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH.**

* * *

It was icy cold and the cold winds were beating down on Kagome's back as she got off of Kirara's back and down onto the frozen ground. It was now dark out but lights from the village just not to far away could be seen in the night. The bright stars and the quarter moon could be seen up above her; something she had grown used to seeing after growing up in a city and time that made it so you could not see them so clearly.

Hopefully the village would allow Kagome and Kirara as well to stay there for the night. There wasn't such a good chance that they would be able to find shelter and warmth tonight and the cold seemed unbearable; or maybe to someone other than Kagome at the moment. Kirara worried over Kagome and Kagome pretty much knew Kirara wouldn't allow her to go without shelter and warmth tonight.

The two slowly walked towards the village; their soft footsteps could be heard along with the rustle of the grass underneath their feet. The cold air and winds continued to make them shiver.

_'Where will this lead me?' _Kagome thought as she paused looking up at the starry sky.

Where she would go or where she would end up was not something Kagome knew. Her fate was unpredicted and maybe had yet to be written; maybe it already had been written. Written somewhere among the stars making it so she couldn't read it. Kagome couldn't help but want to know what that was, it was a pathetic trait that all humans had whether she liked it or not.

All humans want to know their paths that they will take and their futures. They were scared of what may happen and the unknown. It was like that in the time she was born in and the time she lived in now; it would continue for the rest of time. Human beings were really frail and weak. Always scared of things like death and practically everything that wasn't known to them.

That is why like in her time their were scientists and such observing things, trying to gain knowledge of what they didn't already know. Like space; they knew nothing of what was out their billion light-years away or how things became to be. So they spend their lives trying to understand and comprehend things; though in the end they run out of time and still are left with only questions and in fear.

The frailty, weakness, and fear of her kind sickened her and even more knowing she was one of such a weak race. Because her race was so weak that meant she was the same; weak and helpless. Stuck in the same pattern that would never stop. She couldn't deny it; she was weak. She had become what she was today because she was; Inuyasha was right back then when he had compared her to Kikyo. The cold distant person she had become was sign of that; or maybe it made her stronger, she wasn't sure. That was something she didn't know and didn't spend time to think about it.

Kirara mewed bringing Kagome out of her thoughts and back to the world around her. She smiled down at the fire neko telling her that she was fine before looking ahead to continue onward to the village. Kagome took two steps forward before stopping again. Before her was a priestess, wearing the formal read and white garbs. Her hair pulled back in a low ponytail like Kikyo wore hers. A bow in her hand and an arrow already out and prepared to shoot at any moment.

"Who are you?" The priestess asked; her brown orbs narrowing in suspension.

"Kagome." Kagome asked in an empty voice like always.

"Why are you here demon?" The priestess asked raising her bow, pointing it at Kagome.

"Demon? I am no demon. As a priestess shouldn't you know that?"

"But I sense-."

"I have only spiritual powers; your skills are lacking."

"Then explain why you are here." The priestess asked in annoyance.

"I have left my village and I was hoping I could stay the night at your village."

"I am the protector of this village-."

"I am not asking for your protection and I am not here to harm your village; I only ask to stay where I is warm for myself and my companion." Kagome said gesturing to Kirara.

"That is a demon; I will not risk my villagers safety."

"This demon as you put it has only helped human beings. Kirara has helped humans for years. She lived and helped the demon exterminators, myself and my friends before their demise, as well as Midoriko herself."

"Midoriko was a noble priestess who wouldn't associate with a demon neither would the demon exterminators." The priestess said as though in defense for the exterminators and the desisted priestess.

"Midoriko wasn't so cold to shun all demons just because others of their kind did such heinous things. As for the exterminators… I knew one personally, she was one of the lasts of her kind after their village had been massacred. Kirara lived with her and the exterminators before I even met my late friend."

"What are you then if you are no demon but have spiritual powers? Some kind of dark priestess?"

"No." Kagome said in anger from her words.

"Does not matter; I will not risk my villages safety. For all I know you are just like that evil half-breed that was after the jewel of four souls."

"Naraku…" Kagome said as memories played in her mind.

"That pitiful half-breed was the cause of so many of my villagers deaths after an attack by his incarnations."

"Why would I be like him when I was one of the ones that helped destroy him?"

"What?"

"Myself along with my friends helped kill him."

"The only survivors were said to be the priestess by the name of Kikyo who had protected the jewel, a half-breed by the name of Inuyasha, and an unusual priestess."

"The unusual priestess is myself."

"You do not wear the formal garbs."

"Because I chose not to."

"If you are who you are then prepare yourself." She said before letting her arrow fly.

Everything slowed down as the arrow sped towards her. An arrow, a normal arrow was all it was. It could not kill her but it could wound her but seeing as her powers would heal I quickly it wouldn't be nothing to be concerned about; not that she was. Everything returned to normal as the arrow turned to nothing in midair leaving no trace behind of its existence.

Before Kagome knew it the priestess strung another arrow pointing it at Kagome. Kagome narrowed her eyes in annoyance as she moved her hands as though she was holding a bow, stringing it with an arrow. In a matter of one second a blue glow formed in the shape of a bow and arrow before Kagome let it fly as the priestess let her own normal arrow fly. The two arrows soon collided and with a flash they were both gone; Kagome's destroying the other and disappearing with it.

"I will not kill you, nor will I continue this." Kagome said lowering her hands.

"I am sorry." The priestess said apologizing. "I had to make sure you weren't a demon; there has been many attacks on this village by both demons as well as humans sadly."

"I understand."

"You and your companion may stay the night if you wish."

"Thank you."

"I have plenty of room in my hut; you may follow me if you wish. Oh I never gave you my name; my name is Kiyoshi." The priestess said smiling before turning around and walking towards the village.

Kirara looked at the priestess the up at Kagome mewing before following the priestess. Kagome turned her head up to the sky once more gazing forlornly at the stars before walking after her companion and the priestess now known as Kiyoshi.

There was something odd about this village, Kagome could feel it. That priestess had an odd vibe coming off of her as well. Like some dark evil thing kept up inside away from prying eyes, or to anyone that might pass by. What was it, what could it be? Kagome snapped out of her thoughts and pondering as they entered the village.

Soft glowing from lights from within the huts peeked out and out onto the 'street' lighting up their path. The smells of warm food hung in the air from the villagers dinners. Kagome couldn't help but notice the villagers peeking out of their windows and doors as she followed Kiyoshi to her hut. Their faces were covered by the shadows making it unable for Kagome to see them. Kagome stopped as Kiyoshi did when one of the male villagers around the age of twenty-five or so came out and said something quietly to Kiyoshi. The priestess nodded her head and the villager left back to where he had come.

"My hut is just up this way." Kiyoshi said smiling before continuing once again.

As Kiyoshi had said her hut was just at the center. Kagome and Kirara followed her inside only to be greeted by the scents of herbs and medicines; a familiar smell that Kagome had grown accustomed to after living with Kaede for so long now.

"You may sit where ever you wish."

"Thank you."

"Welcome to our village."

"Who was the villager earlier?"

"Oh that was only one of the villagers that help protect the village. The villagers here are a bit skittish and weary of newcomers because of the constant attacks on us. He was just making sure things were fine." Kagome nodded her head in acceptance. "Are you hungry by any chance, I still have some stew left over if you like."

"No thank-you." Kagome said holding her hand up. "Thank-you though for the offer."

"No problem a all. I'll be right back." She said before disappearing into the back room, only to return a moment later with blankets folded up in her arms. "Here you go. You may set them up however you wish. I am sorry but I have to return back out side and help in patrol for awhile."

"It's fine." Kagome said quietly.

"I hope you will be comfortable; I'll be back later." She said before going back outside.

Kagome laid the blankets out getting comfortable under them with Kirara snuggled up next to her. Kagome looked up at the hut's ceiling and within moments sleep claimed her tired form.

* * *

Koenma sat up right behind his desk with his hands folded neatly on top of the large desk in front of him. A look of seriousness showed on his face, his familiar pacifier stayed still in his mouth. The noise of the ogres outside his office was quieted by the large double doors. Inside his office it was quiet except for the fuzzy sound of the large T.V. screen that was still gray. Botan stood in front of his desk with a shook look on her face and George standing next to Koenma with a nervous look. Papers were piled up on his desk that had yet to be looked at.

"Where are they?" Koenma yelled breaking the silence.

"They should be here soon Koenma sir." George said trying to calm the young ruler.

"I don't have time for this." Koenma said pushing a small red button on his desk.

A black portal appeared above their heads in front of Koenma's desk and soon Yusuke was seen plumiting down hitting the floor with Kurama, Kuwabara, and Hiei falling after him a moment later. They all fell on the ground in a pile with the exception of Hiei who landed perfectly on his feet next to their tangled forms.

"What the hell?" Yusuke yelled as he sat up pushing Kuwabara off of him.

"Hey!" Kuwabara yelled sitting up."

"I believe you wanted something; you wouldn't have brought us all here for no reason." Kurama said standing up all while brushing himself off.

"Yes-." Koenma was rudely interrupted by Kuwabara and Yusuke's bickering. "**QUIET!" **Koenma yelled in anger silencing the two. "You two pay attention!"

"Woah - chill man." Yusuke said standing up with Kuwabara doing the same.

"This is serious Yusuke; something horrible has happened and we don't even know how it happened. Seeing that he finally had all of their attention he continued. "Last night thousands of demon souls came pouring into our gates."

"Koenma sir; 957,962 demons have been reported dead sir, they are still going through them." George said speaking up.

"What happened to kill so many?" Yusuke asked.

"I was **trying** to get to that." Koenma said. "A second before this happened are radars suddenly went off because of a strong energy level in the Makai, it was so strong we could feel it here in Spirit World."

"Do you have any idea what may have caused it?" Kurama asked.

"No, we don't. When we tried to bring the site up on the screen we got this." Koenma said gesturing to the fuzzy gray screen.

"So we have to go and see what it looks like or something?" Yusuke asked.

"No, Botan already went."

"Botan?" Yusuke asked.

"Are you alright Botan?" Kurama asked noticing her appearance.

"Yeah, you don't look to good." Kuwabara said in concern.

"I'm fine." Botan said a bit shaky.

"From what Botan reported everything for miles has been destroyed leaving nothing alive in the area. We have no idea what or who could have caused this."

"So what do we do if you have no idea what happened?" Yusuke asked.

"You are to go to the site and see if you can find anything that might tell us something."

"Oh great."

* * *

Kagome woke up later on, Kiyoshi still hadn't returned it seemed; not that Kagome was concerned or anything. Outside she could hear voices. She quietly stood up telling Kirara to b quiet as well when she woke up from Kagome's movement. Kagome peered outside and saw the villager from earlier and Kiyoshi whispering about something. They both nodded before walking off. Kirara and Kagome couldn't help but notice a scream a minute later; something was going on.

Quietly the two walked out through the door looking around for a sign of someone or something but found nothing. That's when they heard it again, screaming. Kagome looked down at Kirara when she began to growl, the fire neko's hairs standing on end. Kirara quickly took off down one of the narrow 'streets' on their left with Kagome quickly following.

The streets were dark and quiet except for an area up ahead where some noise and light was coming from, peeking over the huts. The scene seemed so odd, like Kagome was watching it from outside; as though it was on a TV screen somewhere. The site she came up on was odd.

There was a demon standing in front of the priestess several of the male villagers, along with a couple of the village maidens from the looks of it. The demon had long silver hair swooped up into a high ponytail on top of his head and two golden eyes. He wore a black kimono top with silver trimming with matching pants, boots, and sash. Armor adorned his chest similar to Sesshomaru's only it had a dark tent to it, as well as a sword at his side.

"Please, I beg you to spare our village." The priestess begged.

Kagome was slightly confused to this. Why was he priestess begging the demon to spare the village? You would think as the priestess of the village Kiyoshi would be fighting the demon. Yet here she was begging, pleading practically for her village to be sparred with a look of fear on her face.

"I have sparred your village for some time now; almost a year. What makes you think I should continue to spare your worthless village?"

"Please; we beg of you!" One of the men begged speaking out earning a glare from the demon.

"Komoru, we offer some of our village maidens to you in hope that you may spare us once again." Kiyoshi begged.

"These three?" He asked. "These are the best you have to offer?"

"Please-." Kiyoshi was saying when Komoru cut her off.

"I've heard enough of your begging. If you cant even offer me something better then I see no reason why I should spare your village."

"We will do anything-."

"Having troubles priestess?" Kagome asked.

"What? You; this is none of your concern." She said bitterly.

"Now who is this? I haven't seen her in your village before." He said looking at Kagome and Kirara. "Nor the fire cat."

"They are only passing through and needed a place to stay for the night."

"Who are you demon?" Kagome asked stepping forward.

"Who are you human to speak to me?" The demon asked ignoring her question.

"My name is of no importance to you."

Just what Kagome needed, another arrogant and cocky demon. It disgusted her how some demons thought they were so much better than humans just because of their race. They go around killing villages for sport and use some for their own means, whatever they may be. This one was no different, no wonder the priestess was so cautious before.

"Just another worthless human I see who doesn't know their place."

"Please ignore her." The priestess said speaking up again.

"If it is this demon you are so scared of priestess I'll save you the trouble and kill him for you." Kagome said in her cold tone unsheathing her blade.

"You think you can kill me human, do you? And with some human blade?"

Kirara quickly transformed as Kagome unsheathed her sword preparing for battle. It had been awhile since both of them had fought; not counting the demon from the other day. But a good fight is something that neither of them have had in awhile and maybe this demon would hit the spot. Kagome quickly swung her blade around in her hand, getting the feel of it in her hand once again. The swooshing sound of the blade as it cut through the air stopped once her hand stopped. A familiar glow soon wrapped around the blade as it seemed to come to life on its own.

The villagers stepped back, surprised by this seeing as none of them had seen such a thing and wondered if she was something else; or some other kind of human. Kagome and Kirara ignored them and focused on their opponent; both very used to this by now.

"No, it is you who do not know their place." Kagome said in perfect fighting stance.

The demon gave out a laugh the moment the words had left her lips before staring her down as she prepared to attack, though he wasn't counting on her amazing speed. There wasn't a blur of any kind as she swiftly and quickly moved towards him. Somehow this human before him moved faster than any demon he had ever seen, so fast that there wasn't even movement in the air. It wasn't even a second before she stood behind him, still in perfect stance.

"Your speed surprises me human." The demon spoke as his two fingers traced the long deep cut marring his face.

"I suggest you be more careful demon, I would like a decent fight before I kill you and your carelessness could have killed you just then if I chose to kill you just then."

"Don't tell me how to fight, you are nothing but a human with a couple of tricks."

"Suit yourself then."

The demon unsheathed his own blade pointing the tip of it at Kagome's head, the gaze he was giving her would have had her frozen shitless only years before… Before everything she had come to know. The demon before her charged at her, his movements swift and quick but his sword never close enough to even graze her skin. Kagome was always faster, her movement always more elegant and swifter. Her blade making its own song as it cut through the air, magical. In all the movement neither ever noticed the glow surrounding the blade or the pulse of the blade as it was brought back to life. It only took a minute for the blades song to be complete but the second it finished Kagome realized she was being pulled into a void in the air she had seen once before.

* * *

"Koenma sir we seem to be getting a picture on the screen." George said alerting Koenma and the others before Botan made a portal for them.

Silence soon filled the room, the screen flickering a bit before showing everything clearly. What was seen looked like a wasteland, it was clear nothing was alive. Botan was the only one not shocked since she had seen it not to long ago. The silence was broken by Hiei who wasn't effected by this.

"We are to find out who caused this." He stated more than asked.

"Y-yes." Koenma said taking his eyes from the screen.

"I have never heard of such a thing ever happening." Kurama said as he still looked at the sight on the screen.

"I hope I don't have to fight whatever demon caused this." Kuwabara said shivering.

"Sounds like a challenge." Yusuke said grinning cracking his knuckles in anticipation.

"What's that?" Botan said pointing to a small flickering light off in the distance.

"George, bring that up on the screen." Koenma ordered.

"Right away sir."

"Is that a portal?" Botan asked referring to a hole appearing in mid-air as it opened up to the point someone could easily walk through it.

"It appears to be, but I don't see anyone stepping through." Kurama said examining what he saw.

"There isn't any demons standing around either just some trees hanging around." Yusuke said.

A minute later a demon was seen stepping out or well being thrown out, his body landing roughly on the ground. His appearance was soon followed by a large blast coming from the portal killing him on contact only for the portal to close after the brutal attack.

"What was that?" Kuwabara asked.

"It just appeared; quiet odd." Kurama said confused by what had happened.

"Maybe that is linked with what occurred earlier; go there and find out what's going on." Koenma instructed.


	4. Trials and Tribulations

_**Alive, Just Shattered **_

**Chapter 4: Trials and Tribulations **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH.**

* * *

A dark red vast of nothingness surrounded her on all sides. An eerie vibe crawled up her skin, and oddly she liked it. It was empty and dark, as though it were a mirror reflecting her inner self. There was no one here but Kirara who appeared to be knocked out on the ground somehow. Here she was safe somehow for there was no one here to cause her more pain; then again causing her more was impossible. After a certain point when she had completely _'shattered' _pain no longer affected her.

Pain was only a memory of the past now. She was now far beyond pain and agony, she now could only feel a never ending emptiness that could never be filled. Nothing that went on effected her and she felt nothing. No emotion graced her being and her face forever showed the same plain expression; because there was no expression on her face.

Like a blank white sheet of paper. There was nothing on it leaving it plain. It was dull and had nothing to it, it was just…there. Just like her, she was just there. Had no purpose or reason yet she remained; why she did not know. Everything was just so far away now and at times Kagome really wondered if she was actually here and not dead completely. Though she wasn't dead neither was she alive, she was just there stuck in the middle somehow. Though she supposed she liked it like this, this is what she had became accustomed to. She felt nothing so she couldn't be hurt and that somehow made everything better. She wasn't running around always in tears over someone she would never be able to have only to watch them with another.

It was some time after the final battle after she had discovered she was stuck here or well there in the past that Sesshomaru had showed up. As always him and Inuyasha fought only this time it was Kikyo fighting along side of him. Her arrows and attacks were useless on him though she tried her best to help Inuyasha all the while not getting in his way. The two siblings fought like usual, Sesshomaru for the blade he had decided was still his birth right after so long of no longer caring.

As the fight went on Kagome sat on a tree limb on the edge of the clearing giving her a perfect view. For the first time she did not move to help Inuyasha nor would she. Sometime along the way Kikyo was knocked out when she didn't move quick enough to evade the attack that was aimed for Inuyasha. In his rage Inuyasha became careless and was soon knocked out from loss of blood. As he walked over to his prized possession he had longed to bring back to the lands his father had protected years past Sesshomaru finally noticed Kagome.

_"How is it that I have not been able to sense you till now?" Sesshomaru asked not turning around to face her as he stood before the ragged sword projecting out of the ground. _

_When Kagome never answered he finally turned around. She had managed to catch him off guard. He was a bit curious to know how he couldn't sense her. She seemed to have no sent, aura, or anything. It was like she wasn't even there unless you saw her. The only way he realized she was there was from the feeling of her eyes watching him. _

_There was a slight breeze out making it cool and refreshing, thankfully the wind was blowing away from him so that he did not have to smell the stench of blood. The breeze swayed the small branched, the leaves shadowing her face from him. _

_"Tell me, why is it that you did not help him? I've known you to interfere, why is it you did not this time?"_

"_It is pointless." Her voice emotionless all the while sending a slight eerie feeling his way, there was something different about her._

"_Do you not care for him?"_

"_That is within the past. I wanted something I could never have."_

"_You have given up?"_

"_It is fruitless to run after something you can never catch. Even if you could, would it really matter." It was more of a statement than a question._

"_I see." He said stepping away from the ragged blade. "What has happened to change you in such a short time?" Sesshomaru inquired. _

"_It is the events that take place that shape us, I am sure you know that." Kagome said landing down on the ground, raising her head to Sesshomaru. _

_Sesshomaru was caught off guard once again, this time by her appearance. This was not the girl had had known. A sword at her side and clothes that were nothing like what he had grown accustomed to her wearing. It was her eyes though that had him taken back. They were cold, dark, and so empty now. They seemed to draw you into their dark depths allowing you to truly see what she had within her soul, there was nothing there._

That had been the first and only time she had seen an emotion on the western lords face. After that he had left, leaving the blade behind. It was something about what she had said that made him change his mind and realize he didn't need it.

Kagome was brought back out of her thoughts and back to where she was, where ever this place; where she had no clue. She had somehow gotten her because of the sword Totosai had made for her but now she wasn't sure how to get back. Before she had woken up back from where she had came but now she was still here. Then again, did she really want to go back to that world. This was her way out, though she still didn't know what this was or where it led.

It must go somewhere because all those demons must have come from somewhere. Maybe she could go to where they had come from, some other world that didn't have Inuyasha and the constant memories of all she had lost. She couldn't stay here for forever, the question was how to get out?

* * *

Chills went up the teams spines as they entered Makai, even Hiei was getting an odd chill. Kuwabara who had the highest spiritual awareness out of them all had it the worse. Botan stayed with them up till the point where Yusuke demanded she go back seeing as she still wasn't well. It felt odd not having demons charge at you trying to take your life. The group didn't want to be there any longer than they had to that was except for Yusuke who wanted a good fight.

"Well this appears to be the place." Kurama said as they came to a stop.

"Yeah there's demon or whatever." Yusuke said walking over to the corpse.

"I don't want to have to fight whatever did this." Kuwabara said kneeling down next to the corpse poking the body. The moment he touched the dead body it fell into dust that was quickly blown away by a gust of wind that came along with a high pitched scream that had the hairs on their skin crawling.

"Well there appears to be no sign of what may have caused this." Kurama said stepping back from where the body had been a moment ago and looked around at the surrounding area.

"Whatever it was will show again." Hiei said glancing over the area.

"For now there is nothing we can do." Kurama said with a tired sigh.

"So we came out here for nothing?" Yusuke asked.

"Appears so." Kurama said. "All we can do now is report back to Koenma, maybe he has something."

"I highly doubt that." Hiei said as Yusuke worked on contacting Koenma to get a way back. "There is something not right about this and I am sure Koenma wont be getting answers so easily."

* * *

Make it go away, make it all just go away! The screaming the laughing was caving in around her and this empty world only made it seem to echo around her. What has going on? Why and how was this happening to herself. Where had her broken form gone? Why was she feeling this heart filled pain that had her wanting to scream at the top of her lungs? It was eating away at her, everything she had been through. Why was she suddenly screaming for him, his touch… his love.

It finally came out in an ear piercing scream that left her breathless. Words, distant whispers echoed in her mind. They suddenly had her in a rage; anger. These words telling her that no one would ever love her and she would forever remain alone and useless. Useless just like Inuyasha had told her many times.

'Something's not right…'

This wasn't her, she shouldn't be like this. This wasn't like her, or what she had become. Maybe it was this place…this void that she was in. Somehow it was effecting her and she didn't like it at all. Like everything that had gone pass her when she cracked, her pain and anguish was somehow in this place; surrounding her, suffocating her. Kagome glared at the surrounding area around her. As though some unknown foe was out there waiting for its chance to attack.

This place was quite odd, she had never heard of any place like this. Not in any of the old books her grandfather had or at any time in Inuyasha's time. Though she had been places and done things that were unheard of before. Who ever heard of a girl being able to time travel? Still, this place was odd. It was nothing but a great vast of… nothingness. Like the dark empty eyes of 'the void' otherwise known or had been known as Kanna.

It still puzzled her as to how she got here to this place in the first place. How she somehow stumbled upon this place. How long would she be here? She couldn't stay here forever. Sadly she still needed things like food and water, though it was odd that in the time she had been here she had never had the need to eat or drink anything.

'Home… I want to go home, but where is my home; do I even have one anymore?'

* * *

The sun hung low in the sky as the sky was painted in violets and reds. The air was still with an ominous feeling hanging about like a thick fog in the early morning. The large clear blue river flowed quietly and there was no movement in the trees along the river bank. Even the waters shooting off the cliffs forming a waterfall seemed to be quiet, which was odd and something not really seen. It was like all life had stopped waiting, waiting for something to happen.

One swift breeze blew, swaying the strands of grass and tree branches to its will; whistling in the air like a soft charm. Strangely what sounded like someone exhaling soon followed after, the sound could be heard as though someone were whispering in your ear. That's when it sounded, cries. Not painful cries but more like battle cries, as though an army were charging into battle.

Men, no more like dead beings came out. Their skin that darkest of blacks, their bodies bone and where their eyes should have been were silver flames. These… beings had rotted teeth, though you could tell they were razor sharp and could tear flesh with ease. Thousands of these dead beings came rushing down the rushing waters, covering the entire width of the river and as far as the eye could see. The once clear blue rivers were now flowing with these dead beings that seemed to be out to take the life and devour any they came across. The blue waters were now corrupted by rich, warm, dark crimson blood. Yes the waters had now changed into blood as these 'beings' rushed across the land in search of life that they would in turn kill like savage beasts.

Thick warm blood flowed swiftly between her legs as the once dead rushed past her, never once acknowledging she was there. Why; shouldn't they be attacking her or something? What was going on? Maybe she was with them, just as dead and empty minded. Maybe like them, she wanted the taste of blood. Alone she stood surrounded by blood, alone she screamed.

* * *

Kagome took in a sharp breath shooting straight up, eyes wide meeting the same empty space as before. What kind of dream was that?

"Yes that's right I'm here." Her voice was as empty as her soul and spirit.

Through all of this the fire that had burned within her very being had flickered and eventually it burned out leaving the cold empty being that she was today. That fire was what separated her from Kikyo, what made her stand out, and what gave her that will to fight to save her friends. It was that burning fire that made her who she was and without it and that heat it provided she had become cold and distant. Now she was all alone, alone in a place she may never even get out of.

* * *

Over the past year Inuyasha had grown and matured, or at least more than he was before. Though he was right there along with Kagome in the final battle, it was easy to see that Kagome was effected more than he had by it. In the end she had lost all her friends, though he had to though in a slightly different way. Even after all she had lost, Kagome was there when he wished for Kikyo and him to remain together. Somewhere in him he knew of Kagome's feelings and how this would effect her. He remembered that day, the day he watched his friends die and Kikyo was brought back to life fully…

_Inuyasha was covered in sweat and the blood of both himself and others. Some of it the ones he had slain that day and some was even the blood of his dead friends. His silver hair was tangled and in a mess, clinging to his face due to all the sweat. Crimson blood stained some parts of it, almost blinding into his now torn red clothing. His fire rat coat was torn, dirty, and somewhat ragged; though it could easily be fixed to the point it looked brand new._

_Wounds marred his body, blood still flowed from them but they would soon begin to heal due to his demon blood. He continued to breath heavily, his body weak from battle. The tetsusaiga slipped from his grasp landing on the ground with a clatter. Across from him Kikyo stood still in a regal pose, though it was easy to see she herself was tired. Her clothes were stained with dirt and blood. Her bow in her hand as she gazed about scanning the area, then over to Kagome. _

_Kagome was off to his left, at some point she collapsed to her knees, her head bowed down, and her hair cascading down like a curtain hiding her face from view. Her bow laid on the ground before her. In the palm of her hand the jewel they and all fought so hard for laid ever so innocently. There was a sad aura about her. Right then she looked more fragile than he had ever seen her. Her clothing torn and seemed to just fall apart, the rest of it was covered in blood. Her hair clung to her form as sweat rolled down her face. Her face pale making the bloody cuts stand out more on her. _

_Kagome clutched the jewel in her hand, her nails digging into the palm of her hand as she look up and around at the carnage around her. Kikyo walked over checking on Inuyasha before he brought her into an embrace. They had finally done it, Naraku was dead and they were free from his terror. They were both taken out of their celebration when Kagome walked over stopping in front f them. The two of them had forgotten about her in there moment of joy. _

_"Here, take it." Kagome's voice was weak and tired as she handed him the jewel._

_"What? But -." Inuyasha was saying when Kagome stopped him._

_"It's yours, I want nothing more to do with that thing. It is what you have wanted and have fought for, for so long so now its yours."_

_"Kagome you fought just as hard."_

_"Do with you want with it." Kagome said turning away, walking off._

_"We could bring back the others." Inuyasha said making Kagome stop._

_"No."_

_"What? I don't understand, I thought you would want that; I mean I do to."_

_"They would rather stay dead than come back now having to relive everything. I told you to do what you wanted."_

_"What about you?" Inuyasha said._

_"Inuyasha-." Kagome said wierly lowering her head. "Do what you want, don't worry bout me. I think we both know what you want."_

_"Then I wish for Kikyo to come back to life and live again." _

_Kagome looked back at him, her aura seemed to flicker before fading away. Her eyes sad, though she knew that was what he wanted all along. At least now he could be happy, even if it meant he wasn't with her…_

While she lost him when Kikyo was brought back he had lost her as she broke and began to die from the inside. True he was happy with Kikyo and they and finally after so long were able to start their life together. Though having to see Kagome fall apart as she did was painful all the same.

Kikyo was grateful for what Kagome did, because if it wasn't for her she wouldn't have been able to have a chance at a second life or a chance at a life with Inuyasha. Kagome's action was selfless and because of it Kikyo had grown to see her in a new light. She had grown to see Kagome as a friend, something she never had many of due to her position as a priestess and protector of the jewel of four souls. But because of Kagome's action Kikyo ended up watching her fall apart and into something far beyond what she had once been. They both threw their own happiness sadly had to watch their friend fall into a state where it pained them both to see her like that. The Kagome they had known had died and it was partly their part.

They both knew somewhere within that she would fall, though they never imagined that it would become this severe. Who would have ever thought she would become this way, they were to blame. None of them ever dreamed that this would be how things turned out. Not even the thought that some of them might end up dead. Sure they all knew that there was the chance that they could die, all of their lives were dangerous and they could have died at any point in time. Though none of them had ever thought of their little group would ever be broken apart like this, maybe the thought of losing even more after everything would be to much for them.

The memory of having to watch the only people you have ever called friend before your eyes isn't something that you could just forget. That is something that made a permanent imprint on your mind. The guilt of not being able to save them weighed down on Inuyasha and it seemed to push Kagome down farther. If only he had tried harder he may have been able to save them. Kikyo herself felt guilty because of it. Even though they weren't her friends necessarily she could have tried to save them, they were the friends of the one she loved. They might have been brought back to life if it was not for her.

* * *

Kagome laid there, there was nothing else she really could do in this 'place'. She had come to the conclusion there was no way out, this would be her 'prison'. Half the time she seemed to be in a daze. Her mind half here and the remaining part stuck within herself. She was trapped within memories, memories that couldn't harm her no longer. She was far to damaged now that nothing could harm her, she was already swallowed whole by something she couldn't describe.

Kirara hadn't moved since they had arrived it seemed, she remained asleep for some unknown reason to her. Sleep… it had been way to long since she had a peaceful one. One where she knew when she woke up everything would be fine. Where she wouldn't have to worry about attacking demons or the plaguing memories and reminders of her life. That was something she only knew as a child where her mind had been clueless as to what was around her.

Sleep… something she wanted desperately. Maybe in sleep she would somehow gain something. At least then she could be taken away from this place and the thoughts that consumed her mind. ….Sleep; so she did and she would for years to come.


	5. Will o’ the wisp

_**Alive, Just Shattered **_

**Chapter 5: Will-o'- the-wisp**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH**

* * *

From deep within the foggy grounds of the world of dreams something tugged at her pulling her out. What she did not know. The world she had come to know as her dreams that she had been 'living' for so long became blurry, images fading from sight. Something was pulling her back to the world of the awake and all she could do was be pulled into it. She took in a sharp yet deep breath as she shot up, finally arriving in the world of the awake… or where ever she had become to be.

Kagome looked around her; the place was just as she had left it from the looks of it. Just as empty without a soul besides herself and Kirara who appeared to still be sleeping. For how long the fire cat had been sleeping she did not know and she couldn't even say how long she herself had been sleeping. In this place nothing changed to even imagine how long or for how long she had even been in this place.

She was now awake, something she did not wish to be. Kagome gazed down at her hands. They were just the same as the last time she had been out in the cold, frigid air from where she had come from. The question rung a bell again. How long had she been in here, in this 'place'; then again it didn't matter.

Kagome raised her head looking up where in her dreams she had seen a bright blue sky. Within her dreams she merely seemed to watch as people went on with their lives, though she wasn't seen by any. It was like she was just a ghost, though she knew she was alive and that all of that had been just a dream. In her dream she had seen Inuyasha and Kikyo and had watched them as they lived their 'lives'. She had watched as a sickness swooped over the lands, an illness that she had read about in her time. She watched as the plague killed many, including Inuyasha and Kikyo's first born.

Kagome felt nothing as she watched the dream play out. She knew it was a dream and only that, nothing more. Besides if it were things like that no longer seemed to affect her anymore. Sorrow had consumed her till the point she could no longer feel it. The pain and anguish was turning her numb.

Somehow she had been brought back here to gaze upon the empty depths of her prison. There were no walls or bars keeping her in. Instead there was nothing but a vast nothingness that stretched as far as the eye could see. This nothingness separated her from the world of Inuyasha and all she had come to know as well as where she had lost it all. That was all in the past now and the past could not be changed.

Kagome closed her eyes, images of clouds going across a bright blue sky played in her mind as though someone had sped up time. The sun rose and descended in the sky as time seemed to fly by within seconds. The tingling feeling of life was on the tip of her senses as though it were teasing her. Stretching her hand out as though trying to grasp it and hold onto it.

Life…. A life is what she desired again, to just forget it all and start over. Was it so much to want that simple happy yet so naïve life she had once had? For one day to just be able to see her family again.

_'Inuyasha…'_

Truth was she still loved him and she had never stopped. The feeling never weakened in any way. A longing grew within her as time had grown on. She accepted the fact him and her could never be. Maybe the reason she desired him so badly was just a longing to be loved, maybe that was all it and ever been. In truth that is all anyone ever wanted and deep down everyone knows it whether they realize it or not. No one can say they would truly live a life of solitude because somewhere within them even if it's a small piece buried within the depths of their mind they desire that. It is something that all human beings desired.

Human beings are weak and sadly very fragile. Emotions are what make them and can so easily destroy them; something Kagome knew all to well about. They need the company of others to survive.

"I want out…I wish to live again." Kagome said just above a whisper.

She felt it, a pulse. It was faint like a gentle breeze. It pulsed again as though bringing her back to life. Life…that tingling feeling on the edge of her senses. The small hairs on her arms were standing on end. Kagome unsheathed her sword, the air rippling around it as it seemed to come to life.

**_'Live…'_**

****

* * *

****

We all desire to be in a place that we can belong in. We all desire somewhere where it is safe and free of things that frighten or bother us. A place where we can know we are _home. _Some never do manage to find that place and so they wander and their ambitions are nothing but a will-o'- the-wisp. Those that wander may never find a long lasting happiness only a momentarily or false belief of happiness. Will any of us truly find happiness?

The sky was painted in hues of gray and blue. Rain fell high above from thick gray clouds only to be frozen and turned into snow as it made its way down to the ground. The world was covered in a thick blanket of cold white snow. Ice cold kisses touched her face as she opened her eyes to the cold world around her.

Her body was numb as she shivered from an icy wind that hit her back. Looking around she saw no one or nothing, not even Kirara. Her only companion and friend that she had left, was missing. Searching quickly with her eyes she saw no sign of the furry cat. A meow reached her ears as she quickly turned around only to slip on the cold hard ground and fall back into the icy snow.

Have you ever had that moment when things just seemed to slow down as though put on slow motion? That's what it was like for Kagome as she fell. The wind blowing harshly as her long raven locks flew up in the air contrasting against the pale world around her. Soon she was lying on soft snow gazing up at the gray-blue sky.

A soft sigh escaped her lips as she sadly gazed up at the sky. Could she ever be happy as she once was again? The truth was no she couldn't. She was dead on the inside and the action to be happy within her was lost for forever. Kirara walked over giving her a nudge already in her larger form and now seemed to be fully awake. Still Kagome laid there not willing to move just yet. From a place so dark to this land of cold white was a strain on her eyes or maybe her body was growing more tired as the days grew on.

Some say that the body could not live without the soul. Kikyo should have been proof of that. Though if that was true, how was she still here in this realm where the living still roamed? Her own soul was torn and shattered into so many pieces. Though maybe the fact that even though it was not whole but still connected to her somehow she remained here. Why was she still here? What purpose did she serve?

'What god has forsaken me? Who could possibly deserve something such as what they have thrown onto me?'

Kirara mewed once again trying to urge Kagome to get up. The icy snow numbed her, freezing all the pain that echoed from the remains of her shattered soul. Why had fate put her on such a desolate path? Why had her cat have to go into the well house? Why did she follow? If she never had so many would still have their lives. If she hadn't have gone would the demon named Mistress Centipede have taken her brother instead? Though if that would have happened her brother would have died for sure.

Was he even ok hundreds of years into the future where she had once named it as her home? Was her mother crying over her lost daughter? Did everyone she knew morn over her? Or did her mother have some will-o' -the-wisp that her daughter was fine and would one day even return to her? Sadly if that were so she would be kept waiting the rest of her days.

In the end do we ever get what we truly desire? If so then she must be an exception. Do we ever find a place where we feel as though we truly belong? If so when would she find a place where she belongs?

Kirara nudged her again, quickly becoming impatient. A soft and almost undetectable sigh escaped her lips as she sat up, snow falling from her hair in the process. Her sigh was heard by no one but Kirara who meowed in satisfaction. Soft, white, icy flakes of snow continued to fall making her long tresses appear to have white intertwined with them.

"So where do we go now?" A question for who Kagome wasn't sure who to.

Kirara walked away leaving Kagome to follow and to think of where they could be. With all the snow there were no real land marks to look and figure out where they could be. Though Kirara seemed to have some idea. Either that or she just didn't care. Did it really matter where she was? Where ever it was wasn't where she wished to be. Her friends weren't here, they were dead and her family were years from now.

Slowly Kagome stood following her companion now noticing how long her hair had become. How long was she in that place? Her hair now reached her knees and her skin had become a ghostly white from the lack of sun. Strangely she still wasn't hungry and she wasn't even tired.

Kirara mewed again, now stopped and waiting for Kagome who had stopped to catch up. Kagome quickly trudged through the snow leaving a trail in the snow behind her. The harsh cold winds blew again hitting her back though it seemed to have no effect on her, it only numbed her more from the aching pain that cried out from the remainders of her soul that still remained inside of her.

Have you ever asked yourself what would you do if everything you knew fell down around you? Could you carry the pain and try to carry on despite all that had happened? Would you collapse in it all? In our most desperate moments we hold onto anything that we can to keep us from falling. If you fell, whether tripping off of something instantly your hands will reach out trying to grab anything that you can. The same thing happens when you fall emotionally and mentally. But what happens when there is nothing to grab onto? Simple you fall and when Kagome fell she shattered.

It seemed like forever as they continued to make their way through the snow. Gradually as the day went on the snow got deeper till the point it was up to her knees. The icy winds continued to hit her back and she was sure there was now ice forming in her hair. At times she wasn't even sure if she was able to even feel her limbs but she didn't care.

It soon began to grow dark as the sun made its way down the sky and beyond the horizon. The clouds blocked any light that the stars may have provided and Kagome was left to walk in the dark. Kirara had long slowed down and now it was Kagome who walked ahead with Kirara left to follow on.

When everything is gone and you don't know what to do you try to get away. Unknowingly that is what Kagome was doing. To just have a place where she knew she belonged and she could at last be at peace.

_"Welcome home Kagome!"_

"Mother…" The one word passed her lips as an image of her appeared in her mind before everything went black.

* * *

_"Kagome what are you going to do once the hunt for the jewel shards is over?" Sango asked._

_One of her closest and only girl friends she saw now a days and her were sitting together by the camp fire. Shippo who was still a child even if he was a demon was fast asleep next to Kagome. Her eyebrows drew together. What would she do? She hadn't really thought of it. Could she stay here or would she go home? What did one have to offer that the other didn't? Kagome took her gaze off of the flames and back to Sango._

_"I'm not really sure now that I think about it. I have my family and so much in the time I come from. No matter what if I do go back to my time I will still come back to visit everyone."_

_"It must be hard being away from your family so much." Sango said with a hint of sadness and grief in her words._

_Kagome was quiet for a moment, not sure what to say on the subject. One reason was Sango had lost her whole family because of Naraku and her only family left was under Naraku's control. The other was because even though she was away from them she knew they were safe and she had another set of family here._

_"Yes I do miss them a lot but I have you guys also." Kagome said breaking the moment of silence. _

_"We are more like family now aren't we?" Sango said smiling._

_"If I were to stay … for good that is, it would have to depend on how some things turn out I guess." Kagome said turning her gaze off to the fire blushing._

_"Why Kagome I didn't know you thought of Inuyasha like that." Miroku said as he entered the camp in a joking way._

_"I don't mean like **that."**_

_"So you were talking about Inuyasha." He said sitting down on Sango's other side._

_"I never said that either." Kagome said quickly looking down._

_"What about me?"_

_"Nothing." Kagome quickly answered, Miroku and Sango were laughing next to her._

* * *

It was cold and dark, where was she? When had she even passed out? All she remembered was a blur of snowy white, the cold winds, and her urge to walk on. Laying there looking up Kagome realized she must be in a cave as she looked at its hard rocky ceiling above. Sighing she closed her eyes enjoying the pitch black nothingness that came to vision. There was a time when she was young that she was afraid of the dark, afraid demons would come out and harm her. Her mother would always be there to save her from those fears of hers. Now that she was older she knew what true demons and fears were . If only her mother could be here to wash these fears away.

If she could go back and change something, anything… would she be like this now? What wouldn't she give to change all of this or at least have someone or something to hold onto now. Once you've fallen and you get something to keep you up you hold onto whatever it is just to keep up no matter what because that fear of falling again; faster and harder than ever is so much more terrifying. If she could just have someone…

'Anyone…'

But hopes and things like that were pointless. There's no one left for her now. A light hit her face making her open her eyes to see the first rays of the morning sun. Slowly Kagome got up, walking to the edge of the cave to see where she even was. Kirara was asleep in the back, trying to keep warm the best she could. She must have carried her here after she passed out. At least she had someone watching out for her but what did it matter now?

It was still somewhat dark but the morning rays cast a purple glow over the land that was still covered in layers of snow. The sky was covered in thick dark clouds that promised even more snow. Walking out a bit she realized her clothes were frozen stiff with ice, the thin material wasn't made for winter let alone so much snow. Despite her frozen clothes and the icy cold air Kagome walked out of the cave leaving any sort of warmth she may have had, enjoying the deep snow. Raising her arms she twirled around, hoping some of her happy childhood innocence would come back to her.Why is it we have to have so many dreams and wishes that will never come true but in our dreams and sometimes not even there?

A soft yet sad melody came from her lips echoing off the rocky mountains around her as though they were singing along with her. What wouldn't she give to have someone here with her and wrap their arms around her. Everyone wants to feel needed and wanted, the desire to be loved is within all of us no matter how much we may shun the feeling. Coming to a stop and letting her arms fall back down to her side she gazed up at the sky. Would she ever feel like that again? Was she even able to?

Turning she directed her gaze back to the cave. She has been so selfish and completely forgotten about Kirara. Even if the fire cat was a demon she couldn't handle this kind of weather for forever, she needed somewhere warm and some food. She herself would go on days without sleep or food if Inuyasha hadn't forced her to take care of herself. Finally giving in to what was left of the little voice in her head cheering her on to do good deeds she walked into the cave; she had to find real shelter for Kirara.

The harsh winds hit against her side urging her to hurry. Walking in her eyes saddened upon seeing Kirara huddled in the back. The poor thing was in her smaller form, to tired to remain in her larger one. Would she really allow the only friend she had left to die because she was so selfish? Where could she take the fire cat? She had no idea where she was or how far any real place to rest would be.

Why is it as you get older things tend to hurt you more and more? As a child things don't hurt you so much. Maybe that would have to do with not understanding what's going on. You would thing or at least like to think as you get older you learn how o deal with things but instead it all just hurts more. Would she ever be free of this?

* * *

_Kagome woke up with a start. She breathed heavily sitting up in her bed. Looking around at her surroundings her face quickly changed to a mournful expression. Memories of her friends deaths and the well's no acceptance of her entered her mind. _

_It had been only yesterday that she had tiredly walked over to the well seeking peace and a world where she could heal. There had been a difference this time when she jumped in. As she roughly hit the bottom with a hard thud it dawned her that she wasn't home and she soon found out she couldn't go back._

_Kagome rubbed her sore arm as she thought back on it. Seeing as her dreams only haunted her she had no desire to return to them. Standing up quietly as to not disturb old Kaede she walked out. Upon walking out her eyes went to the dark starry sky. It was cold out and she could easily make out her breath in the darkness, her only light the stars above. Kikyo and Inuyasha were in their own hut they had gotten yesterday. It only seemed right that the new married couple had their own hut to live in together. _

_The thought ate away at her and made her cringe as an icy pain consumed her entire being. Having to see the one you love with another was one of the most painful things she had ever encountered. Would she hate their children? Why couldn't her friends still be here? At least then she wouldn't feel so alone. _

_Lost in her thoughts Kagome walked, her hands standing on end as the cold brought tiny little bumps all over her body. The moon could be easily seen though the trees bare limbs. Fallen leaves covered the ground. They had fallen just like she had. How could she remain here? Well in truth she had no choice but how could she cope with everything here? She would get better wouldn't she? She came to a stop once she came to the well. Slowly as though she was frightened she walked over resting her hands on the well's surface. _

_The old wood felt smooth under her hands. If she jumped in once more - maybe she could go back this time. Letting out a shaky breath Kagome jumped. The thought of home was strong in her mind. Her hopes went unanswered as she harsh hit the ground hurting her arm further. Laying there she cried, warm salty tears rolled down her face instantly. Why couldn't she just go home? Why had her time forsaken her?_

_The soft meow of Kirara didn't register in her mind as she continued to cry. The fire cat softly landed next to her. Somehow Kirara understood her pain and curled up next to her allowing Kagome to hold her and cry. Kirara would be the only one to ever see her cry._

* * *

Kagome had been walking for some time now and had yet to come upon a village. It was about midday and even though the sun should be clearly seen high in the sky it was hidden by the thick clouds and heavily falling snow. Kirara would dose in and out as she continued to walk, constantly shivering. Kagome hadn't really realized it till now but her companion has been weak ever since they had come out of whatever that place was. It was as though the place drained the energy from her.

A sigh escaped her lips as she looked sadly down at her companion. Kirara lifted her head signaling she was awake once again before yawning and jumping from her arms. Kirara stretched before transforming into her larger form which was better for this type of weather.

"Your awake." Kagome said grateful.

Kirara gave a soft meow before signaling for Kagome to get onto her back so they could continue onward. Kagome was grateful and quickly got onto her back. She had been walking in the deep snow all day and was tired, the rest would be good for her. Kagome tiredly wrapped her arms around her neck resting her head. Kirara quickly took off to find a village. Kagome needed warmth and food just as much as she did even though she may not say it.

Kirara flew in the skys pushing on against the falling snow and icy winds. Kagome fell in and out of sleep. Sleep wouldn't be easy no matter how tired she was. The icy winds felt like knives against her bare skin. There was so much snow in her hair that it looked as though it were white instead of black. Her thin clothing was stiff with a thin layer of ice on them. Her purple lips trembled as her entire body shook from the cold.

Kagome quickly shot up as Kirara quickly jerked and moved to the left dodging an oncoming attack. Another attack came out of no where knocking her off of Kirara's back. A gasp escaped her lips as Kagome sucked in a large gulp of air as she fell from high above. As she fell she could barely make out Kirara trying to dodge another attack. Her hair blew past her as she quickly fell.

'_Inuyasha…._'

Kagome hit the ground with much force, the deep snow doing little for her collision with the ground. Sharp pangs of pain coursed through her body. A painful moan escaped her lips as she attempted to roll over. She collapsed to the ground in pain, the soft sound of crunching snow could be heard.

"A priestess huh? Now what would you be doing on your own in this day of age?"

Kagome struggled to raise her body off the ground. Her bow and arrow had fallen off of her in the fall and was somewhere in the snow. Weakly she fell onto her but as she drew her sword from its sheath.

"It wasn't a smart thing to be on your own when your kind is hunted down and killed." The demon said as he walked closer.

Kagome looked around but couldn't make out anything in the snow. Where was Kirara, was she alright? Scooting back some Kagome held up her sword trying to find out where the demon was coming from.

"You pathetic humans think you can possibly rid the lands of a race that is superior to your own when it is your race that should die."

Kagome slowly and cautiously stood trying to ignore the surging pain. She wasn't sure what he was talking about but whatever it was she wasn't in a good position.

"You pathetic human, die!"

Kagome quickly raised her blade in defense as he lunged at her. He quickly pushed off distancing himself from her, vanishing back into the snow. His stoic laughed rang in her ears as he watched her from the shadowing snow. Kagome's eyes scanned the surrounding area tryng to make something out. The demon was dressed in all white and his white hair made it easy for him to blend in.

The sudden crunch of snow quickly alerted her as she turned around to see him lunging at her again. Kirara quickly came to her rescue tackling the demon to the ground. Kagome quickly raised her blade in prepare of an attack as the demon threw Kirara off of him.

"Why are you helping this human when she and all of her kind will hunt you down and kill you?" The demon asked Kirara. "All humans must die!"

Kagome stepped back quickly swinging her blade as the nameless demon lunged at her again. The demon jumped back again knowing if he got to close long enough he could easily be purified. Before she could react she was hit from behind, being pushed to the ground. She quickly tried to rise and turn to attack back when she was beat to it. A bloody hand protruded from his chest. Blood and muscle clung to the sharp claws of the hand. Kagome moved her gaze to the demons face, his expression was filled with pain.

The now dead demon was quickly thrown to the side, his blood staining the white snow. She quickly moved her gave to her knew threat. Where was Kirara? Looking up she met another demon dressed in white with silver hair, she froze once she met gold eyes.

"Inuyasha-.'

Kirara could be heard growling as she stood next to Kagome. At least her companion was alright. Looking up at the demon she could see a from marring his face.

"How do you know of the half-breed known as Inuyasha human?"

Kagome relaxed upon realizing the demons voice. No he was not Inuyasha but he was Sesshomaru. Somehow she knew she would be alright.

"I used to travel with him. You would think you would remember seeing as you tried to kill me when I pulled out your father's sword."

Kagome stood up placing her hand on Kirara's head telling her it was alright. Sesshomaru and her may not have ever been on the best of terms but she doubted he would kill her.

"So it is you, I am surprised to see you alive girl. I had assumed you died in this large killing of species."

"Genocide…"


	6. Genocide

_**Alive, Just Shattered**_

**Chapter 6: Genocide**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or YYH**

* * *

It had been years since this amount of deaths accrued on such a large scale. Hundred of years ago the species had been divided in to two. There were the demons who considered themselves the better race. Demons ruled over the humans and the lands were divided equally between demon lords who looked over the lands. Then there were the Humans who were considered the weaker race. Humans unlike demons had an extremely shorter life span. They were easily sickened and weakened. Very few came to any kind of power and only the determined and gifted were bestowed with power.

Humans never did like the idea of demons ruling over them. So there were human lords that 'ruled' and looked over a given amount of land. These warlords governed the area and the demons did nothing to oppose the idea. In fact it made things a tad bit easier. The demon lords had large amounts of lands to observe and it made things easier for these human lords to take care of the smaller issues. Because of the convenience the demon lords aloud these 'warlords' to govern the area in which they lived.

Humans were in fact very weak whether from their mortality or their weakened senses. Very few actually came to power. Some strived all their lives for power and there were a few that demons actually respected for this and their desire for something more. Though there were those few selected groups that did appose some kind of threat to the demons. The demon exterminators apposed a threat, their name expressed it all. In some ways they were a convenience. They went and took care of the lesser demons that caused trouble in the demon's lands. Though there would be the times when these exterminators would go and kill innocent demons. They killed demons that had never even harmed anything unless for food. They would go out and kill new born pups and never feel anything because they considered demons a threat to their society. In truth the demons did not mind the humans as long as they didn't cause trouble and were not a nuisance.

Another group that cause much trouble for the demons were the 'holy' and the spiritually 'gifted'. Yes it was these humans that had the power to kill a demon. They were considered the stronger of their race and were greatly despised by demons. Humans with holy powers consisted of Monks, Priests, and Priestesses. They thought their acts upon the demons were righteous and noble. They killed without remorse never thinking of the innocent lives they killed. It were these group of humans that would bring about this massive war of the species.

Demons by nature were really not all that bad. They protected their own like any human would. Sure there were those that did kill for sport but you had that in any race. Usually demons wouldn't kill unless for food or protection. Wars among demons were few despite what some may think. Though when there were wars they were massive and long.

Demons governed their land thinking of both themselves and everyone that lived within them no matter the race. It was actually better that demons were in control of the lands. Humans were rash and never in their lives would be able to learn all that was needed to govern the lands properly. Demons had much longer lives and were able to learn all that was needed to govern the lands like they should be. They could learn every inch of their lands and understand the vegetation. They would know the history and would have the knowledge on how to react to problems. Because demons had longer life spans things would remain more stable without the worry of a new ruler and their ideas. The power as a Demon Lord was passed down the family. The family would have all the knowledge and would be able to prepare the upcoming lord on all they would need to know thus keeping the stability. Ideas that one had would pass to the new lord because most likely the ideas would stay in the family.

Demons were more powerful than demons and would be able to protect their lands properly if and when attacked. Demons have years to grow stronger and gain more skills. Despite what humans think Demons provide the lands with strength, reliability, and stability.

Humans by nature always strive to be more. As time grew they became envious of the demons and their power. It grew to a point where they were afraid of them and so the rebellion accrued. The humans were tired of the demons ruling and considered them a great threat. It was the demon exterminators and 'holy' ones that lead this idea and brought it into action. This group of humans convinced the rest that the demons were a threat to their lives. The rebellion was brought to life.

For years the war on Humans against Demons continued. Humans trained in the art of killing all their lives to try and bring an end to the demons. The 'holy' ones gathered training any who might have the power. Going out it waves they 'purified the lands' of demons. Demons could protect themselves against the exterminators but could not from the ones with spiritual powers. This war was not something the demons had predicted and were left open to attack. The Demons acted quickly to this threat. This massive was could only be described as genocide. Both species were out to destroy the other.

Even now years later after it came to an end demons hate the humans though the humans remember nothing of demons. They remain apart and will remain as so. It is all for the best and things have been better this way. It can be clearly seen the two can not live together.

There are a few demons that still reside within the human world. They live there out of request from the Spirit World to keep stability. As long as the humans don't find out about this things should remain well.

* * *

Confusion and tiredness weighed heavily on Koenma's mind. He hadn't slept or even stopped to rest in days. It had been three days since the event that had caused utter chaos upon the Spirit Realm. They had yet to straighten out the mess. Thousands of souls had yet to be counted and sorted on top of the normal flow of souls. Each one had to be questioned trying to get some kind of clue as to what caused this.

What ever had caused this couldn't have come from a living being. The power was to strong and large to have cause something like this. The amount of deaths reminded him of the stories of the war against the species that he had heard about when he was young. He of course was very young at the time when it was going on.

During that time he remembered his father was always gone, hidden by the stacks of papers behind his desk. Enma was always troubled, trying to find a way to sort so many fresh souls at once. That of course was many years ago and he was barely old enough to remember any of it. Now he had to wonder if this was like what his father had to deal with.

A tired and stressed sigh escaped his lips. Botan was at least well now and that was one last thing he had to worry about. Seeing as Yusuke and the others had school he had Hiei off in Maki. Hiei knew the land very well and had the time to maybe get some kind of clue. He hardly heard from the apparition and he could only assume he was fine. Hopefully he would return soon with some information. So far he had no information or leads from the demons that had been questioned so far. It seems that they were all asleep or killed before they even knew what happened.

The fact that many were asleep complicated things. Not only did they posses no information but it caused problems. Thousands of demons woke up to find out they were dead and in Spirit World. The confusion caused much chaos that had finally been brought down.

"Koenma sir! We've found a witness!" The blue colored ogre said in a rush bursting though the double doors to Koenma's office.

"Well hurry up; bring him in!" Koenma said quickly.

At last they had found someone who may have some answers. Sitting up straight trying to look dignified even though the bags under his eyes easily gave away his lack of sleep. Moving his pacifier to the other side of his mouth he prepared himself. Finally after what seemed like forever they were going to get some answers.

A shaggy looking demon came in. His long black hair was a mess and his old blue clothes were in horrible condition. Dirt painted his face and clothes along with dried blood. His claws and wolf tail were the only signs he was demon other than his aura. Koenma cleared his throat getting the demon's attention.

"Take a seat." He said gesturing to the chair in front of his desk that had been brought in.

"So you're the prince of this place huh? Your just a baby!" Koenma glared at the offending demon.

"Yes I am. Now would you please tell me the information you have on the events leading up to all of this." Koenma said seriously wanting to get the low class demon out of his office as soon as possible.

"Yeah I know who did it." He said smugly. "It was none other than that cold bloodied demon. The one from the -."

"I know who your talking about." Koenma said quickly cutting him off. "Take him away!" He yelled to one of his servants in an annoyed tone.

"What? Just going to throw me out? It was him, I swear it!" The demon said angrily.

"I know for a fact he wasn't because he was with my father during the time." Koenma said as the nameless demon was carried out of his office.

"Um - Koenma sir?"

"What is it now?" He said wearily.

"I've found more people. They all say they know the cause of all of this."

A tired sigh escaped his lips, his head resting in his hands. This was going to take awhile. Maybe somewhere in all of those demons who had nothing for him but lies their might be an answer.

"Line them up and let them in." Koenma said shaking his head. "And someone find out if Hiei has found anything."

* * *

It was cold and the air was frigid. The snow fall was growing thicker and more abundant. Kagome's checks had grown a bright red from the icy winds. Silence hung in the air, the cold had managed to freeze that as well. Kagome's eyes were glued to Sesshomaru's golden eyes. They felt so familiar.

'_Inuyahsha…'_ Her mind drifted off to the only man she had ever loved.

It felt like forever since she had seen him. Her body cried out for his touch. What wouldn't she give to see him again. What wouldn't she do just to feel his lips press against her own just one more time.

"Tell me how you are alive?" He said in a demanding tone bringing Kagome out of her thoughts.

"What?" Kagome said confused.

"It has been fifty years since and yet you still look as you did years ago. I will admit a few things have changed but your youth still clings to you."

"Fifty years?" Kagome said taken aback a bit. "That cant be."

"It has been fifty years since it has been rumored that you were alive. I know that dark priestesses have the power to keep their youth but I sense to evil from you."

"So.. It has been fifty years?"

"My _brother_ had mentioned once that you had left and presumed you to be dead." His voice came out strained and harsh upon mentioning Inuyasha.

Closing her eyes she saw his face. A soft smile on his face, the corners of his mouth raised just enough to tell you he was. His golden eyes shown like the sun on a clear summer day. His bright silver hair shined under some unseen light.

'_Kagome..' _

Kagome opened her eyes to meet gold again only it was Sesshomaru not Inuyasha. It always amazed how similar yet how completely different the two were. Each were strong though their strengths came from different things. Inuyasha had the strength from his friends where as Sesshomaru got his from years of practice and his pure will to come out on top. Sesshomaru was patient and Inuyasha didn't have an ounce of anything near that in him. They both shared gold eyes and the same silver hair. Inuyasha's eyes were rough yet soft at the same time and Sesshomaru's were hard and icy cold like the snow around them.

Looking into his eyes she saw no softness that Inuyasha had only seeing his calculating gaze. He looked as though he was trying to determine something about her. Though what exactly she didn't know. Was he looking for a weakness or a point to strike? What was it he was looking for?

"You are sick." He said finally breaking the building silence.

"No I'm not." Kagome said denying his assumptions turning to Kirara who stood by silently.

"Even demons can become ill in this kind of weather." Anyone else who said this might have sounded like they cared but even now he expressed no emotion in his voice.

"I am fine Sesshomaru though I thank you for your concern." Kagome said as she began to walk past him making sure to step over the dead corpse.

"I do not care for some mere human girl. I was stating a fact nothing else." He said not bothering to turn around to look at her.

Kagome continued to walk away from him. The snow fell softly determined to turn her raven locks white. Kirara followed her, looking at Sesshomaru as she passed. Sesshomaru was a reminder of what she lost. Yes he was completely different than _him _but the resemblance in appearance was undeniable. The empty void that had over time replaced her heard was sucking her in.

"You do realize you are in demon territory girl." He said making her come to a stop.

"So?" Kagome said turning around to look at him.

"You are human." He said as though the problem was obvious.

"That doesn't mean ill be killed." Kagome said glaring at his back at the offence.

"This is a very different time incase you have not noticed." He said turning to meet her hard gaze with one of his own.

"I've survived against demons before-."

"He is not here to save you girl." The words cut through like a knife through butter.

In her mind she could see him before her. No matter how fast she ran he would always be out of her reach. Finally as she fell to her knees crying out his name he disappeared from her sight. He was gone and there was no one there to keep the living nightmares at bay.

"I have no idea how you managed to survive till this time or how you managed to keep your youth but nothing will help you survive alone in this time." He said with a blank look.

"I need no one." Her voice was as cold as the air around them.

She had come to terms with that a long time ago. When she gave up Inuyasha she knew she was really alone. Building up her skills training day in and out she prepared herself for the lonely road ahead. That was her biggest mistake, she had relied on him way to much. She loved him without holding back never thinking she would have to make it without him. Now she saw things more clearly and she had become more self-reliant.

"Your physical state says otherwise." He said with a slight smirk.

"I don't need help, I am fine on my own." She bit out angrily. "Kirara, come on."

Before she could take a step Sesshomaru walked off ahead of her. Turning to walk the other way determined that the nearest village wouldn't be found walking in his direction. She would show them all that she didn't need help. She wouldn't get caught again helpless like Inuyasha had left her, she really couldn't afford it. She hated being weak and left helpless in the in the end. It was like something crawled under her skin, an itch she couldn't scratch.

"I will show every single last one of you…I will show you Inuyasha that I never did need you." Kagome made out through clenched teeth.

"I am not him." Sesshomaru said stopping once again.

Even when Kagome thought the snow had fallen thick as it could it seemed to pour down even harder. Looking through the dense snow falling down she could see _him_. His long silver hair and his golden eyes that even now pierced her to the soul. Looking at him she couldn't hold back her anger. She has always loved him but he never returned her feelings. Even as she cried for him when he was on the verge of life countless times. AT night in his sleep he would call out for her. Why wasn't she good enough. If the jewel had never been in her - she would have never met him.

"Kirara…lets go." She said leaving.

A harsh wind blew, seemingly taking her breath with it. Collapsing into the cold snow everything around her seemed to blend into together. The sound of crunching snow as though someone were approaching her echoed in her ears.

"You're to weak to continue on."

His words caused pain in her heart. A pain that brought a truth she didn't want to believe. She was weak, not just from weariness. She was weak emotionally for a long time now. No matter what she did she couldn't seem to get rid of it.

'_I will never be good enough…will I?' _

Finally giving in her body collapsed into sleep knocking Kagome unconscious. Looking down on her Sesshomaru pitied her. There was a time that he held some kind of respect for her, as much as he could for a human. She pulled out his fathers fang and could bring his brother to his knees with a single word. Even though she was a mere human she had knowledge beyond her years. Now she had grown so weak and full of sorrow and hate. Even though she tried to hide her emotions with training and other things he could see past all of that.

For a human she had been strong and her spirit even stronger. There was something about her that just couldn't be broken or so he had thought. She would lay her life on the line for her friends. Now that Naraku had passed she had grown weak and bitter. He would even say that he envied her.

Kirara walked over tiredly to her fallen friend. Kagome needed help badly. She was weak and needed a place to rest. Kirara knew her friend would never ask for help and would never stop herself till her body stopped her like it just had. Kirara knew that she herself was weak as well. Where ever they had been had drained the life from her. With the cold and how long they had been walking she couldn't help her friend much longer. Giving a soft meow she turned to the demon lord.

She believed he would at least be kind enough to help them. The demon lord was cold but he did at one time at least hold respect for Kagome so maybe he would help. Time had obviously passed and things were different in the world. He talked of humans and demons at war. He was probably not against humans so much because if he had he would have killed Kagome already. At least she liked to think that.

"I expect you want me to take her with me?" Sesshomaru asked the fire cat to be responded by a nod.

It would be a dangerous thing if other found out he was helping a human. Though many wouldn't believe it. He wasn't exactly known for being kind to anyone especially humans. He would be safe to bring her with him. He was strong enough to take any attacks that might be made on him. Though did he really want to bother himself with someone else.

Kirara must have read his thoughts because at that time she gave what would have been a glare. Kagome was stubborn enough and she had little energy for Sesshomaru. Kagome had helped him once or twice before, the least he could do was help her now.

Kagome was growing weaker and everyday she felt her friend drifting of to a place where no one could reach her. Like her companion Midoriko, Kagome was distant from the world she lived in. Though what set them apart was that Midoriko never let herself grow to far where as Kagome dived into it. If Kagome wasn't careful she would drift to far and wouldn't be able to come back even if she wanted to. Looking at Sesshomaru she silently pleaded for his help. As if understanding he nodded.

"I will take her with me but only till she is physically well to live on her own." Kirara nodded. "It isn't a safe time for humans so it will be your job to look after her."

Sesshomaru turned to leave expecting Kirara to carry her. When he didn't hear her following he turned to see her curled up asleep, already back in her smaller form. Giving a mental sigh of frustration. Why was he helping this human? This was the very one that did what he could not at his fathers grave. She protected his brother when he would have slain him many times. Though she did help him understand that he didn't need his father's sword. Maybe it was because she stood up to him and did things no one else would that he helped her now.

Picking her up from the snow he looked down on her face. It had been years since he had seen her last yet she wasn't any different. Well yes she had changed but not as drastically as he would have thought. She should be old ready to die of old age and yet she clung to her youth. The only differences was the cold look in her eyes. Her eyes were those of someone who has lost. They had once been trusting and filled with happiness.

With Kagome in his arms and Kirara resting on her lap he continued onward back to his home. It wasn't to far away maybe a day or so with his speed. Even with the winter weather he should arrive there by morning. He would continue on till nightfall. Kagome was human and would grow weaker if she went longer without warmth. For now she would have to survive off of his body heat.

The wind blew against his back causing her to shiver. Taking pity on her he wrapped his tail around her some to offer a little more warmth. Humans were frail and would forever be so. They could try to rid themselves of their weaknesses by training but you cant rid yourself of who you are. There were things about her though that made him wonder at times.

Humans were usually stuck in their ways and their ways were all the same. This was true for most but a select few from what he knew. Kagome was proof of something greater in the human race. That they could maybe go living in peace with other races. Sadly there were not enough people like her. At the end of this war which race would survive?

As he trudged on Kagome small form didn't move. Her beating heart vibrated from her body to his own telling him she was alive. Even though she was alive now he could feel it, he could see it in her empty eyes. Kagome was dying and soon she would be to far to save from death's clutches.

'_It's to far late for you girl.' _He thought. _'I don't believe anyone can save you now.' _

Sesshomaru looked down at her as he walked. What had happened to the strong woman he had known her to be? It almost caused him pain to be around her. For a demon he was graced with extraordinary senses. He could easily feel the sorrow and painful cries of her broken soul. It was like an echo yet still caring the message with full force.

Looking ahead he ignored the cold winds. He hoped to reach his fortress by the morning. Hopefully he wouldn't encounter any problems along the way. Even without problems, it would be a long trip.


End file.
